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Now This Just Isn't Funny

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sympazero2 said:
(The Caption wrote itself:)

"I'll see you and raise you 20 minutes with my slave here...
You choose the whip."
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Pp looks quietly at his hand.
image.jpg
"Let's make it 24 hours with your slave and 2 with her Mistress......Pp will choose the whip for the slave but you can choose which one I use on you."
 
A hot brunette in her mid twenties was sentenced to "alternative punishment" for her third time being caught driving with an invalid license.

She was transported to the alternative punishment facility where the warden had a sense of humor. After the brunette was thoroughly strip searched, the warden said "I'm in a good humor, so I'll give you a choice...tickling for 48 hours or being crucified for 48 hours..."

The woman did not know which to choose.

"We;;, we haven't got all day..." declared the warden. "Take her to the site."

Guards manhandled the naked woman to where a Saint Andrew's Cross lay. They bound her wrist and ankle to the cross then raised the cross. The agony in the woman's crotch was unbearable, so much so that it took her forever to see the warden standing in front of her with both arms behind her back.

The woman tried to relieve her agony with sarcastic humor of her own.

"So....I...guess...you went the crucifixion...route."

"Not at all! I am not going to force you to choose."

At this point, the warden pulled her hands from behind her back, showing she was holding two feathers. Even in er agony, the woman's eyes widened in terror. She had good reason to. The warden mercilessly tickled every exposed inch of her naked flesh as she hung in agony from the cross, her agony super-enhanced by the torture of the feathers tickling her flesh.
 
sympazero2 said:
Billy-Ray must be so proud...

Ego Stipes Ergo Sum
​
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Well, what can you say to that. It's a genuine photo, I suppose.
My kids used to watch her show, Hannah Montana.

Now, how about a behind the scenes/what are they thinking of a nude photoshoot?

bitch1.jpg
 
A little girl is standing on top of a cliff, looking down at the sea and crying her eyes out. A priest approaches and says, "My child, why are you so upset?"

The little girl turns to him and says, "My mummy and daddy were in their car -- and it just rolled over the cliff and smashed on the rocks down there."

The priest slowly looks around him while unbuttoning his cassock and says, "It's just not your day, is it?"
 
Tom Tom said:
A little girl is standing on top of a cliff, looking down at the sea and crying her eyes out. A priest approaches and says, "My child, why are you so upset?"

The little girl turns to him and says, "My mummy and daddy were in their car -- and it just rolled over the cliff and smashed on the rocks down there."

The priest slowly looks around him while unbuttoning his cassock and says, "It's just not your day, is it?"
Click to expand...
You might want to check the "Terms and Rules" (bottom right of the screen) - sorry to be a killjoy
 
A hot 35 year-old brunette had just been convicted of driving without a license, habitual offender.

The judge said, "I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that I am sentencing you to crucifxion."

"That's the GOOD NEWS????????????? What's the BAD news??????????????"

"Ma'am," replied the judge, "I can see you are agitated. We'll wait to give you the bad news later."

The woman was stripped snaked, searched thoroughly in all her cavities and bound to a Saint Andrew's Cross, which was then raised. The agony in her crotch was indescribable. Then, as she began the Sisyphean up-and-down cycle to get away from the agony the agony turned into something else...

All of a sudden, one of the woman's crucifiers showed up right in front of her, holding a vibrator.

"The judge told me to wait until now to tell you the bad news," began the crucifier. "The bad news is, here is this lovely vibrator...only I am going to turn it on and leave it at your feet, just out of reach of where you really, really want it."
 
KvK said:
A hot 35 year-old brunette had just been convicted of driving without a license, habitual offender.

The judge said, "I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that I am sentencing you to crucifxion."

"That's the GOOD NEWS????????????? What's the BAD news??????????????"

"Ma'am," replied the judge, "I can see you are agitated. We'll wait to give you the bad news later."

The woman was stripped snaked, searched thoroughly in all her cavities and bound to a Saint Andrew's Cross, which was then raised. The agony in her crotch was indescribable. Then, as she began the Sisyphean up-and-down cycle to get away from the agony the agony turned into something else...

All of a sudden, one of the woman's crucifiers showed up right in front of her, holding a vibrator.

"The judge told me to wait until now to tell you the bad news," began the crucifier. "The bad news is, here is this lovely vibrator...only I am going to turn it on and leave it at your feet, just out of reach of where you really, really want it."
Click to expand...

Sounds worse than a Joan Tree horny dart ... help!!!
 
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