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The Girl With No Name

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Dorothea came to me. I wanted to sit up, but she held me back: "No. Stay where you are. Let me do it, it’ll be quick. " I lay still. My heart was beating now up in my throat. I was in a kind of trance as my cousin’s arms turned me on my back. She folded my arms against each other, wrist to wrist, then tied my forearms firmly together. She began with the wrists, using several loops of rope. She pulled tight and made a knot.

But that wasn’t enough for Dorothea. She took another rope and tied my arms together near the elbow. I had once experienced having my wrists tied behind my back, but what my cousin was doing, I liked even better. "That will do," murmured Doro, but then she turned to my feet. There, too, she wrapped several turns of rope around the joints and pulled the rope twice between my bare feet, before she made a final knot. "Okay," Dorothea said. She bent my lower leg forward, towards my head. "You could increase the potential tension by connecting your hands with the feet-bondage, but you wouldn’t be able to sit up and watch the documentary. Let it be for the time being, tomorrow we can experiment with it."

She grabbed me and sat me so that I had my back against the arm of the couch, and put my legs on her lap. "You’ll stay bound for the whole film. It’s important that you believe in yourself. Bondage of any kind, you can get used to it, Lisette. You may find it a troubling feeling, but you can watch the documentary, even if your hands and feet are tied." "Yes," I said simply. More I could not think. My heart was pounding. Tied up! I was hooked!

Dorothea let my legs go: "I have the recording device turned on, the show’s beginning." She used the remote control. The hard disc recorder next to the flat screen bleeped and the front panel showed the recording was starting. On the screen I could see the image of a strange, clunky sewing machine. "The splendid invention of Mr. Howe," was in bold letters beneath. I made an honest effort to follow the film, but a lot of it I couldn’t take in.

I was sitting next to my cousin, my legs on her lap, I was her captive. Dorothea fumbled with my tied ankles. She stroked my legs up and down on my bare feet.“Don’t tickle me! Don’t!” I wriggled. Dorothea didn’t tickle me, she rubbed and pressed. She ran her fingertips from below between my toes. Then she smacked me with the flat of her hand on my soles. Playfully at first, but always firmly, it smacked audibly.

The feeling these strokes triggered I found pleasant. In the TV speakers, someone explained how Mr. Howe had come to use an upper and a lower thread, and how the two, by means of a downright brilliant technique, were intertwined with each other, resulting in the production of a strong sewing-cord. Very interesting. Really. They should also broadcast a programme on the growth rate of south-east Tibetan alpine lichens, I’d find that very interesting...

I sat bound next to my cousin, my legs on her lap and my feet tied together, being fondled. Again she reached out and slapped me firmly on the soles. "Does that hurt?"I shook my head. "No way," I was thinking feverishly, I wanted her to go on doing it, "but I can feel it’s stimulating my blood-flow." " Exactly," said Dorothea. "As does flogging with birch twigs, like the Finns practise in their saunas - a little painful, but very healthy. It stimulates the circulation."
 
Again she slapped me on my feet, this pleasured me tremendously, but I couldn’t admit it. For all I cared, it could go on forever. "The blood-flow is important," said Dorothea, "because it’s easily disrupted by your forced immobility. Hmm ...." She wondered and hit me with her hand. "The impact is too wide. We need to enhance the effect." She ran her fingers across the mounds directly behind the toes. Then she stroked the soft hollow behind the mounds. I held my breath. Don’t tickle me! Don’t!!! Doro struck firmly on the spot behind the mounds.

"Hand-spanks don’t work well." She lifted my legs and stood up. "I'll get something. Be right back." She disappeared into the kitchen. The television showed a computer animation showing how the sewing machine of the great Mr. Howe wound the upper and lower threads into each other and sewed and teased and whatnot...aliens-TV! I was getting nothing from it. The recorder hummed softly to itself. Somewhere a clock ticked, out in the passageway, a clock in the hallway. A hall-clock. In a clock-hall. The hall-clock, ticking clock in the hallway…

Dorothea came back. She had a small wooden spoon with a round head. I could literally feel my eyes standing out of my head. I knew exactly what purpose this wooden spoon must serve! My heart was ready to burst. Dorothea satbeside me and took my bondaged feet onto her lap. She held up the wooden spoon. It wasn’t the sort with a flat head anda hole in it, but small, round and bowl-shaped.

Dorothea pressed the back of the bowl in the bowl of my right foot just behind the toe-mounds, playfully striking a soft tap-tap. She looked at me: "It's not just about improving the circulation, Lisette. You are hopefully aware that the plan for your progressive training will involve pain?" She looked at me, "Yes, just see! It must be so, believe me! Do you think you can get to endure a full hour on the cross and feel as if you’re sitting comfortably in a deckchair getting pissed? This is hard work, my love. your arms hurt, your chest is stretched, the bondage that holds you sometime starts to burn. It is a painful thing, Lisette. I hope you can follow me?"

I nodded, "Yes." That's all I could say. Dorothea hit a few times, just playing with the wooden spoon on the soles of my feet. It didn’t hurt, it was pleasant, even the smack of wood on my bare skin made a beautiful sound. It was arousingly beautiful. I experienced even more powerful palpitations. "What I'm saying ...." Doro was waving the spoon in front of my face, ".... you should not only practice suspension and generally coping with bondage, but you must also have exercise in enduring pain."

I thought I had misheard. Had my cousin really say that? I looked at her. Dorothea seemed serious and concentrated. I nodded slowly, "Yes, you're right. I should also practise that, Doro." Endure pain! Be bound and endure pain! My wildest fantasies invaded me, the thoughts flashed around in my head like frightened rats. All the little movies inside me! Movies in my head-cinema in which I was tied up or chained and beaten, tortured,whipped, tormented... films in which I had to endure, bear, suffer... forced, defenceless, delivered up... Was Dorothea really thinking of such things, or was she just seeing it as a game? I wasn’t in any position to ask, I knew I'd get no answer, I could only listen and nod silently. I was excited as ever.
 
Do you get time to eat and sleep while you're translating this fantastic story, Eul? :eek:
 
Oh I don't miss either of those :p
I've a slot of about an hour when I get in,
I try to do something for CF before I get my meal -
Luna's 'Amica' if that's waiting, or this tale...
 
Dorothea held up the wooden spoon: "Are you ready?" I just nodded. "Good." My cousin reached out and slapped me firmly on my sole. The crack was audible and I winced. Ouch! That had hurt. My legs jerked and my bound feet wanted to pull together on Dorothea’s lap, against my will - yes, against my will, because I wanted Doro to hit me more. That she did. She grabbed my tied ankles and hit me with the wooden spoon on left and right soles in quick succession.

Every beat thwacked clearly, it was good to feel. It hurt, but it was not unbearable - on the contrary. it felt incredibly good. I squirmed and tried to tug my feet to safety, although inwardly the sweet ordeal satisfied me wholeheartedly. Doro paused. "This is nothing." She looked at me. "It’s too much effort for both of us. You instinctively twitch and recoil and pull back with your legs, and I have to hold onto you with all my strength. This won’t bring any useful results. I’ll have to fix you so that you can’t move your feet, do you understand?

"Yes," I said. There are plenty of ways to make my feet motionless, bondage that would pinion me, to prevent me from pulling my feet away when she struck me on my bare soles. And not just on my feet. There are other places on my body where she could thrash me with a wooden spoon - or a leather strap. Or a stick. With a whip. With ....

My heart was beating so wildly that I could hear roaring in my ears. Dorothea grabbed my bound legs. "We haven’t got the time to do it now. But tomorrow, Lisette, tomorrow we’ll start with it. You’ll have to practise. This is important. I can only pat your feet now like I’m just putting jam on them! There’s no power to it." She lifted the wooden spoon and slapped me again, swinging it far out and slamming it down very hard. I cringed at every stroke, and moaned from time to time. Sometimes an especially strong impact caught me and brought a gasp. My arms were trying to free themselves from the bondage. I squirmed. Doro held tightly on me and went on beating the soles of my feet.

Outside in the drive I heard a car. Dorothea put the wooden spoon on the table. "Bad timing" She un-knotted the cords binding my ankles. Then she picked up the wooden spoon and carried it into the kitchen. My arms were still tied behind my back. "Doro! Come back! Let me free!" I whined, "Your mother will be coming in at any moment." "I'm coming," she called from the kitchen. She came back to me and sat down beside me, lifted my feet onto her lap."Pretty prints from the ropes." She rubbed my ankles, massaging gently. "Dorothea! Your mother!" "Yes, yes," she said, stroking my feet, "how did it feel? Good, was it? " "Yes," I replied, "God, please untie me! She's nearly here! "

"Really?" said Dorothee quite disinterestedly. "Lisette, you need this exercise too! If you’re so afraid someone could come in and see you when you’re in bondage - if you were hanging on the cross, you wouldn’t get down so quickly, even if I were to hurry. You understand that, right? "
 
Coo, I wish...

Being got down from a cross just because Mum's coming up the drive :doh:
 
thanks for the encouraging comments - I need them, this post just takes me up to about a quarter of the way through the story!
but it is good, the psychological insights ring so true, as I work on it I keep thinking, this is me exactly!
This passage, for example, expresses just the problems I have myself with BDSM perceived as a kind of circuit-training,
rather than as a pleasurable erotic game. :p

Chapter 3: Games in the Living-Room

In the living room I made myself comfortable on the couch. I was wearing only a pair of shorts and a T-shirt, and lying on my stomach. Dorothea was sitting as usual in a chair to the right of the couch. She switched off the TV with the remote. Only then did I notice that she had around her neck something like a multiply looped chain. I was amazed, what did she want with it? Was that the latest fashion?

Doro saw my glance. "You know, Lisette," she said, "I’ve been thinking. If we begin this very special training, it shouldn’t be limited to just a quarter of an hour on the cross, once in the morning and once in the afternoon." She looked at me, deadly serious: "The training effect of that would be rather small, right? "

"Uh ...." I was stunned, dumbstruck, said nothing. "Your training is based on several factors," continued my cousin. "The main factors are, of course, being stretched out and being suspended. However, in order to train you for these - or to do better, to endure the same for a longer target-period of time - you need to accept some man-made handicaps associated with the way your body’s attached – forms of rope bondage for example. The whole exercise is both a physical and a mental thing, you should definitely have some extra practice for suspension."

In other words, she wanted to tie me up, here in the living room! Then it was surely right? Doro, Doro, tell me, what is your motivation? Why do you come at me so? I was thinking hard. Why is my cousin doing this? Why is she talking about me getting used to my role? Does she actually think I see crucifixion as just a sporting activity? Do I want to train to hang as long as possible on the cross? Of course I want to, yes, but the whole thing for me isn’t necessarily athletic, it’s simply exciting, it turns me on, it excites me it’s erotic…

Dorothea was lecturing me as if I were in the lecture hall: "It may sound uncomfortable for you when I talk about bondage, saying that you should cope with having it done to you, Lisette, but I think you should consent. If, between the individual sessions on the cross, we plan some additional workouts, you’ll come on quickly. It’s uncomfortable, yes, but that's always the way in sport. "

"Yes," I said, a bit too quickly, "no pain, no gain, through hardship to the heights!" Although I din’t feel tense in the least, my heart was beating wildly."Good." Dorothy smiled like a teacher watching a slightly slow-witted student who’d just grasped something elementary. "Then I think that’s fixed - between the sessions on the cross, you’ll complete more workouts. These should naturally relate to your actual training – that’s to say, restraints of all kinds, not only ropes, I’m speaking of stretchers and clamps. You can’t do much in those, believe you me!”

“I’ve been thinking very hard about it," Doro added enthusiastically, "but to return to the present situation, Lisette, for all your training is in the immediate future, we’ll restrict your movements using ropes or other means, and hold you in different positions using the same restraints. You’ll need easy bondage to begin with. You could probably hold out for up an hour on the cross, or… " I shook my head "No, no, I can’t do that! Nor can you you ...."

Dorothea made a wide sweeping gesture, “The hook of the block and tackle will hold you in varous difficult postures, these poses have to be created using bondage. It’s a discipline you must keep practising, simply being in bondage - you must learn to bear it, always and everywhere, to accept it, no matter how uncomfortable it is for you, so you get used to it." "Yes," I said. "That makes sense to me." O ye gods on Mount Olympus! My heart was galloping.
My heart too! Per ardua ad astra!
 
"Yes, Dorothy," I said resignedly, I was white with fear. Why won’t she untie me? I heard a car-door slam, in seconds Dorothea's mother is going to come in...

"Oh!" Dorothea’s distracted, "This film’s finished." The guy on the screen had gone, Dorothea picked up the remote. She pointed it at the recorder and waited until the credits had expired. This lasted ages, it was long drawn-out, everyone was listed who had participated in the documentation, literally everyone - the director, his assistant, the assistant of assistants and helpers of the assistant to the assistant to the director… the cameraman, the camera woman, the cleaning lady, the hairdresser of the helper of the representative of the cousin of the sound engineer, and the iceman, who was driven daily to the location and had sold vanilla ice cream with chocolate sauce, while the crew- a total of one thousand four hundred and seventy-six people, all mentioned by name – who’d made the pictures of old sewing machines, which were operated by women in old-fashioned clothes… it took at least fifty minutes, although the documentary itself was only half an hour long…

"Doro! Please! 'I was dying of fear."Yes, I know! Don’t be so fidgety, Lisette!" My cousin waited calmly for the credits of the credits, the year and the picture first appeared...

At exactly in the moment it ended, as she pressed the little buttons on the remote control, a key was inserted into the lock of the front door. I was
still tied. And I was close to madness. "Dorooo!"

"Yeah, okay." As if it were nothing, she began to free my arms. She took off the rope, sat down beside me, and let it disappear behind her back. At just that moment, Aunt Annie entered the living room:
"Good day, you two pretty ones. Did you get the Docu done?”
"Of course, Mum" Dorothea said innocently "We’ve just finished. You can see all the operations, it was incredibly interesting. Lisette and I had an exciting half hour, I can tell you."

I sat there like an extra, trying to hide my arms, the marks of the ropes on my bare skin were surely visible. I could barely got my breath, felt close to a heart attack. Aunt Annie didn’t notice anything. She grimaced, "Oh! I’ve got to get out of these shoes! Doro, do make us some coffee. I'm going for a shower. Then we'll look at the film. She disappeared in the direction of the bathroom. I slid off the couch and died, at least a little. Dorothea took the ropes and carried them calmly away.
 
just dropping in to post the next bit.
the first paragraph was at the end of chapter 2 in the original,
I overlooked that, but it'll do just as well at the start of chapter 4 ...


4 To the Cross Again.

madiosi-2015-45-Girlwnn-chapter04.jpg

As I lay in bed that night, I couldn’t sleep much. Again and again Dorothea’s commands rang through my head, she’d sounded like a sports coach, as if I were just jogging or doing warm-up and muscle-toning exercises. But it was bondage! Being hung up! Being beaten! I was totally beside myself. I would never have dreamed that my most secret wishes could ever come true, still less that it would be my cousin who’d give me the chance to experience everything! Just Dorothea, always so helpful in home and garden, always getting good grades to bring home from school, always studying diligently, always polite to everyone... this sweet Dorothea, butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth Dorothea, had tied me up in bondage, had talked about possibly flogging me, as if she were telling me the best dates to sow carrots and peas. I was stunned - simply stunned. And very, very happy.

The next morning we three had breakfast together as always. Aunt Annie chatted merrily with us. I was answering like a machine. I felt strangely unreal, like I was seeing the world through a thick, rather foggy, lens. I thought constantly of what Dorothy had told me yesterday about my exercise, the need to practise enduring pain. What was more, my second crucifixion was imminent. It was the first time in my life that I’d sat at the breakfast table and known that I in less than a half an hour I was going to be tied naked on a cross!

"What are you two up to today?" Aunt Annie wanted to know, "Are you going to the outdoor pool?" Dorothea wrinkled her nose, "It’s a bit too chilly, we’ll probably go for a hike and enjoy the countryside, so Lisette can be turned back into a Spuhl village kid. She needs the fresh air of nature in her lungs and in her heart." I had to smile. The thought took me back to when we were both ten, and since then she’d it every year. Lovely, good Dorothea!

" Get yourselves this new Freedom Ticket," suggested her mother. "You can use it on buses and trains, so you can have long trips everywhere during your holidays." "Not a bad idea," answered Dorothea, "We want to visit the museums, the zoo and we mustn’t forget all those churches and chapels, our future architecture student is interested in religious buildings – and incidentally, I am too" “Don’t forget the great Flower Show," her mother added, "I don’t think you’ll want to miss that." "No way," Dorothy said.

I sat still and spoke not a word. The talk flew around in my head. There was a hell of a mess. After breakfast, Dorothea and I washed up and cleaned the kitchen. We wished Aunt Annie a good day, and then we stood looking straight at each other. "Ready?" asked Dorothea. I nodded. "Then come on." She went ahead of me to the workshop behind the hedge.

I'm going to be crucified, I thought, I'm about to be suspened by my wrists. It was an incredible feeling. I was madly excited. Then we were inside. The cross was on the blocks, waiting patiently. It was waiting for me. I just had to strip naked, then it would take me into its very special embrace, a hug that would grow every more painful with time, as Doro had said yesterday.

Dorothea prepared the ropes while I undressed. I took my time. "These ropes are a waste," said Dorothea She tilted her head and looked at the great wooden cross. "There are leather cuffs. You could fit screws in the holes – and brackets can be ordered on the same website. We’d drill a hole below you to install the cuffs for your ankles."

She watched me as I stripped off, garment by garment. "They could be fixed permanently, Lisette, you see? This business with ropes .... every time, knotting them to loop to loop, always having to be careful that it’s too tight but not too loose .... permanently mounted cuffs would really be better." My cousin was planning ahead. I liked that. It didn’t sound as if I’d be deprived of any pleasure in our new game. Quite the contrary, that would be a nice insurance in case, after a few sessions of bondage, she were to say, "I'm tired of this, it’s too stupid, Lisette. Let’s just go to the pool."

I stood naked in front of Dorothea. "I'm ready." My cousin smiled at me: "Fine." She scratched her chin. "There’s still something Lisette. Being hung up for just a quarter of an hour, that's easy-peasy, don’t you think? All you did yesterday afternoon was get over your first flakiness. I didn’t see any effective training in it. You should have stayed tied up there on the cross a little longer, you must have felt that?" "Yes," I said, "that quarter of an hour passed so quickly, I didn’t feel it was enough." I was shaking again with excitement. Longer! I want more! I want to feel it! I will have to endure it!

Dorothea came to me: "I'll tell you what. The quarter of an hour, we’ll forget it. You start with a half hour, thirty minutes, that’s a beginner’s time, anything less makes no sense. You agree?” "Yes." I replied. I lay down on the cross and spread my arms. "If you agree, then there’ll be no turning back, Lisette." Dorothea looked at me with a peculiar expression in her eyes. "You’ll have to endure the whole time, even if you start whining that you can’t. Do you agree?" I looked up at her. "I'm already lying on the cross, Doro." "Yes." She nodded. "So you have given your consent. I’ll remember that for your future bondage." She smiled down at me. There was something in her eyes that I couldn't quite interpret. I took a deep breath and let myself fall. Tie me up, Dorothea, bind me tight and do with me whatever you will. As soon as I’m bound, I can no longer defend myself. Then I'm yours, helpless. Do it!

She did it. With a soothing shudder, I responded as my right hand was firmly tied, then the left. Now there was no escape. Binding my feet was simply a symbolic act that sealed the whole ritual, I was securely fastened on the cross. But this concept, ‘fastened’, imagine that! Doro slowly pulled me up by the pulley. In my head was a ghostly voice. A radio announcer read out the news: a politician had resigned, on the Spuhl by-pass there had been a car accident, on the property of the well-known Flörke family, a girl had been secured on a cross…

The cross rose, it carried me, held me tight, I was attached to it. Now the cross was standing upright, down below Doro fitted the safety supports. She looked at her watch: "Thirty minutes from now, Lisette." Three hours, I thought. Six hours. A whole day. Who could prevent you from leaving me to stew up here? No one! You'd only set me free when your mother came home. What a thought! Having to spend a whole day on the Cross! Would this be possible? Could I survive the strain? Could I learn to endure so long? Or would it be impossible even to practise for it? Does it really always hurt Sure. Could you learn to endure the pain? Certainly not, pain is pain. Or…?

I tried to lean back on the cross. It didn’t work. Actually, nothing works when you are crucified. The layout of the beam has been almost perfectly devised to give people a little freedom of movement, while making it practically impossible for them to avoid permanent strain on their arms and shoulders.
I moved tentatively in my bonds. I pressed with my knees and propped my feet down on the foot-support. I could stretch myself, and if I flexed my back, I could even get my butt a little bit away from the upright. I could move my lower body a little to the left and right, and so have a little control over the strain on my arms, relieving one arm or the other slightly. But all in all, I was permanently held and could not escape my awareness of this. The bonds were holding me tight, I couldn't get away. It was driving me mad, it was pleasurable, simply beautiful.
 
Last edited:
just dropping in to post the next bit.
the first paragraph was at the end of chapter 2 in the original,
I overlooked that, but it'll do just as well at the start of chapter 4 ...


4 To the Cross Again.


As I lay in bed that night, I couldn’t sleep much. Again and again Dorothea’s commands rang through my head, she’d sounded like a sports coach, as if I were just jogging or doing warm-up and muscle-toning exercises. But it was bondage! Being hung up! Being beaten! I was totally beside myself. I would never have dreamed that my most secret wishes could ever come true, still less that it would be my cousin who’d give me the chance to experience everything! Just Dorothea, always so helpful in home and garden, always getting good grades to bring home from school, always studying diligently, always polite to everyone... this sweet Dorothea, butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth Dorothea, had tied me up in bondage, had talked about possibly flogging me, as if she were telling me the best dates to sow carrots and peas. I was stunned - simply stunned. And very, very happy.

The next morning we three had breakfast together as always. Aunt Annie chatted merrily with us. I was answering like a machine. I felt strangely unreal, like I was seeing the world through a thick, rather foggy, lens. I thought constantly of what Dorothy had told me yesterday about my exercise, the need to practise enduring pain. What was more, my second crucifixion was imminent. It was the first time in my life that I’d sat at the breakfast table and known that I in less than a half an hour I was going to be tied naked on a cross!

"What are you two up to today?" Aunt Annie wanted to know, "Are you going to the outdoor pool?" Dorothea wrinkled her nose, "It’s a bit too chilly, we’ll probably go for a hike and enjoy the countryside, so Lisette can be turned back into a Spuhl village kid. She needs the fresh air of nature in her lungs and in her heart." I had to smile. The thought took me back to when we were both ten, and since then she’d it every year. Lovely, good Dorothea!

" Get yourselves this new Freedom Ticket," suggested her mother. "You can use it on buses and trains, so you can have long trips everywhere during your holidays." "Not a bad idea," answered Dorothea, "We want to visit the museums, the zoo and we mustn’t forget all those churches and chapels, our future architecture student is interested in religious buildings – and incidentally, I am too" “Don’t forget the great Flower Show," her mother added, "I don’t think you’ll want to miss that." "No way," Dorothy said.

I sat still and spoke not a word. The talk flew around in my head. There was a hell of a mess. After breakfast, Dorothea and I washed up and cleaned the kitchen. We wished Aunt Annie a good day, and then we stood looking straight at each other. "Ready?" asked Dorothea. I nodded. "Then come on." She went ahead of me to the workshop behind the hedge.

I'm going to be crucified, I thought, I'm about to be suspened by my wrists. It was an incredible feeling. I was madly excited. Then we were inside. The cross was on the blocks, waiting patiently. It was waiting for me. I just had to strip naked, then it would take me into its very special embrace, a hug that would grow every more painful with time, as Doro had said yesterday.

Dorothea prepared the ropes while I undressed. I took my time. "These ropes are a waste," said Dorothea She tilted her head and looked at the great wooden cross. "There are leather cuffs. You could fit screws in the holes – and brackets can be ordered on the same website. We’d drill a hole below you to install the cuffs for your ankles."

She watched me as I stripped off, garment by garment. "They could be fixed permanently, Lisette, you see? This business with ropes .... every time, knotting them to loop to loop, always having to be careful that it’s too tight but not too loose .... permanently mounted cuffs would really be better." My cousin was planning ahead. I liked that. It didn’t sound as if I’d be deprived of any pleasure in our new game. Quite the contrary, that would be a nice insurance in case, after a few sessions of bondage, she were to say, "I'm tired of this, it’s too stupid, Lisette. Let’s just go to the pool."

I stood naked in front of Dorothea. "I'm ready." My cousin smiled at me: "Fine." She scratched her chin. "There’s still something Lisette. Being hung up for just a quarter of an hour, that's easy-peasy, don’t you think? All you did yesterday afternoon was get over your first flakiness. I didn’t see any effective training in it. You should have stayed tied up there on the cross a little longer, you must have felt that?" "Yes," I said, "that quarter of an hour passed so quickly, I didn’t feel it was enough." I was shaking again with excitement. Longer! I want more! I want to feel it! I will have to endure it!

Dorothea came to me: "I'll tell you what. The quarter of an hour, we’ll forget it. You start with a half hour, thirty minutes, that’s a beginner’s time, anything less makes no sense. You agree?” "Yes." I replied. I lay down on the cross and spread my arms. "If you agree, then there’ll be no turning back, Lisette." Dorothea looked at me with a peculiar expression in her eyes. "You’ll have to endure the whole time, even if you start whining that you can’t. Do you agree?" I looked up at her. "I'm already lying on the cross, Doro." "Yes." She nodded. "So you have given your consent. I’ll remember that for your future bondage." She smiled down at me. There was something in her eyes that I couldn't quite interpret. I took a deep breath and let myself fall. Tie me up, Dorothea, bind me tight and do with me whatever you will. As soon as I’m bound, I can no longer defend myself. Then I'm yours, helpless. Do it!

She did it. With a soothing shudder, I responded as my right hand was firmly tied, then the left. Now there was no escape. Binding my feet was simply a symbolic act that sealed the whole ritual, I was securely fastened on the cross. But this concept, ‘fastened’, imagine that! Doro slowly pulled me up by the pulley. In my head was a ghostly voice. A radio announcer read out the news: a politician had resigned, on the Spuhl by-pass there had been a car accident, on the property of the well-known Flörke family, a girl had been secured on a cross…

The cross rose, it carried me, held me tight, I was attached to it. Now the cross was standing upright, down below Doro fitted the safety supports. She looked at her watch: "Thirty minutes from now, Lisette." Three hours, I thought. Six hours. A whole day. Who could prevent you from leaving me to stew up here? No one! You'd only set me free when your mother came home. What a thought! Having to spend a whole day on the Cross! Would this be possible? Could I survive the strain? Could I learn to endure so long? Or would it be impossible even to practise for it? Does it really always hurt Sure. Could you learn to endure the pain? Certainly not, pain is pain. Or…?

I tried to lean back on the cross. It didn’t work. Actually, nothing works when you are crucified. The layout of the beam has been almost perfectly devised to give people a little freedom of movement, while making it practically impossible for them to avoid permanent strain on their arms and shoulders.
I moved tentatively in my bonds. I pressed with my knees and propped my feet down on the foot-support. I could stretch myself, and if I flexed my back, I could even get my butt a little bit away from the upright. I could move my lower body a little to the left and right, and so have a little control over the strain on my arms, relieving one arm or the other slightly. But all in all, I was permanently held and could not escape my awareness of this. The bonds were holding me tight, I couldn't get away. It was driving me mad, it was pleasurable, simply beautiful.
that sounds great keep up the good story line
 
just dropping in to post the next bit.
the first paragraph was at the end of chapter 2 in the original,
I overlooked that, but it'll do just as well at the start of chapter 4 ...


4 To the Cross Again.


As I lay in bed that night, I couldn’t sleep much. Again and again Dorothea’s commands rang through my head, she’d sounded like a sports coach, as if I were just jogging or doing warm-up and muscle-toning exercises. But it was bondage! Being hung up! Being beaten! I was totally beside myself. I would never have dreamed that my most secret wishes could ever come true, still less that it would be my cousin who’d give me the chance to experience everything! Just Dorothea, always so helpful in home and garden, always getting good grades to bring home from school, always studying diligently, always polite to everyone... this sweet Dorothea, butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth Dorothea, had tied me up in bondage, had talked about possibly flogging me, as if she were telling me the best dates to sow carrots and peas. I was stunned - simply stunned. And very, very happy.
Are you so kind and sending me the chapter as a txt file? So I could improve the e-books and PDF.
That would be very nice.
 
I should be able to do that Madiosi - please remind me next week
(send me a PM), I'm a bit busy just now.

We should certainly get the whole story into a pdf and upload it to the new Forum Archive
when it's finished - just about half-way now.

I've managed to do another bit, some of the best lines I've worked on so far,
I hope members will feel I've done justice to them.
One thing friends who follow my own writings will be aware of,
as a slavegirl, I like to give a capital to words I have to 'respect' -
people (Master), things (Whip, Cross, Rack, etc.), places (Torture Chamber).
In German, Kreuz is of course always capitalised, just because it's a noun,
I've just put 'cross' in this story so far, but in this passage it's personified,
as is time, so I've made it 'Time and the Cross'.
 
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Down below was Dorothea looking on with interest, as I was moving about on the cross. "How do you feel?" she asked, "Is it good for you?" "Yes," I admitted. It was hard for me to express my feelings, it made me feel exposed - but wasn’t I already exposed? I was hanging naked on the cross!

The cords on my joints started to burn - not very much, but I began to feel them. The Cross is slow, a voice in my head told me, the Cross has patience, infinite patience. It deploys its greatest strength slowly - Time, Lisette, it is Time that will conquer you. Time and the Cross together, Lisette, those two together are stronger than you. You cannot escape them. They will test you, Lisette, they will torture you, they will slowly work on you until you’re squirming in agony. You can’t do anything to resist them, you'll have to experience it. They're going to defeat you, Lisette. You are at their mercy, Time and the Cross. Not your cousin. She’s standing down there, just watching you, she can't hurt you, she can only watch what Time and the Cross do to you. Do you see the hunger in Dorothea’s eyes? She looks so happy, she’s liking what she sees. It’s good fun for her, seeing you naked and bound. It pleases her, Lisette.

I blushed. Suddenly I felt ashamed, naked in front of my cousin, hanging outward from the bar. I tried to force myself to lean back. I pulled on my wrist-bonds, I tried to pull my feet in the slings that wrapped around my ankles to fix them. Not a hope. The voice in my head was right. I was captured, I was held in bondage on the cross. The cross has got me, it owns me, it's clinging on to me, it's keeping me, it will not let me go!

"Does it hurt?" Said Dorothea from below. I shook my head. "No. Yes. A little bit. It does." It did hurt, I admitted it. Not unbearable, but it hurt. How long had I been on the cross? Ten minutes? When did it begin to be uncomfortable yesterday? No idea, I had no way of watching the time. I realized that the lack of visible time belonged to the crucifixion. Had a clock hung on the wall of the workshop, I could have tracked the movement of the minute hand. But I didn’t have any sense of time, I'd lost it, lost all sense of time. It was a little unsettling but also very interesting, it reinforced the feeling of being delivered up.

The ropes were hurting. Not much, just a little. My arms hurt too - even that wasn’t unbearable, just slight. From "suffering" and "torment" I was still miles away. It was .... it was exciting. It turned me on. I felt heat in my girl-parts. I blushed again. Bright red. "What are you thinking, Lisette?" Dorothea asked at once, she was registering everything. She looked up, watching me. I gave no reply, my feelings belonged only to me. What I'm feeling as I’m crucified, I'd keep to myself.

The little voice in my head laughed merrily. You’ve no longer got a “self”. She guffawed uproariously, rolled around on the floor laughing. "By the gods of Olympus!" she hooted, "This is the best joke I've ever heard!" She snorted with pleasure. "So you’ll keep it to yourself, what you feel on the cross, Lisette Lange! How long? How long, Lisette? A long time? Let me tell you something, Lisette: you’re naked and helpless, you’re tied up on the cross, that’s a fact. Give the Cross enough time, and you'll be nothing, absolutely nothing. Keep it to yourself, lovely Lisette? The Cross will break your will. He’ll strip away each scrap of pride and replace it with pain! He’s prowling around your legs now, Lisette, like an invisible cat. He‘s taking his time, but he won’t leave you, he’s faithful – more faithful than anything in the world. He will come to you, he will penetrate inside you, he will fill you completely.

You'll keep nothing, Lisette, nothing to "yourself”. You're going to squirm on the Cross. There’s sweat already at the roots of your red hair, oozing out, dribbling over your face. Everyone will see exactly how you’re feeling, Lisette Lange! Everything will be revealed in your pretty green eyes. Your cousin is seeing everything, Lisette, aboslutely everything. Your inner self is being turned inside-out, and she's going to see how your will is broken. You'll writhe in ecstasy of pain on the Cross, Dorothea will feel every emotion. You won’t hold back for long, Lisette – long? Not at all! Not even your innermost feelings! You'll be completely exposed.

I was breathing frantically, my heart began to beat wildly. I understood what the little voice in my head kept saying would prove true. If I stayed on the Cross long enough, when I’d been at the mercy of the Cross long enough, it would come to this. A shiver ran down my spine. I foresaw myself crying on the Cross, slumped, begging Dorothea for mercy. And that grace I would not be granted. What a thought! The heat in my sex-parts increased.

The strain on my arms was insanely strong. It was growing minute by minute. It hurt, but it felt good, it ached, but it was exciting, I was suffering, a little bit at least, but I was enjoying being there. I gave myself up to the sweet pain completely. I was being nursed by the pain! It was what I’d so longed for. I called the pain welcome, and the invisible cat around my legs began to fade. He hadn’t broken my will. I’ve got more! Much more! I’m still Lisette Lange and I can cope with anything! It’ll have a surprise, and not a little one - hah! Not so fast - Lisette’s no longer a shy little kid. She can put up with it, lots of it, much more than you think!

Down below I heard a creak. I looked down and to my boundless amazement found that Dorothea had pulled out the safety rod. Was the half hour gone? Indeed! My cousin went to the hoist and pulled the chain. Slowly the cross lowered. I had to follow it, whether I liked it or not. I was tied to it - on the cross, fixed to it. Still I watched as Dorothea freed me from the bondage. I sat up. My joints did hurt, most in my wrists, but my ankles felt it too, and my arms all the more! My shoulders - wow!

But I had endured it without giving a peep. Dorothea looked at me, blank admiration in her eyes. "The way you looked up there, Lisette! At the end as if you were in ecstasy, you looked like a saint." I smiled to myself. I was hurting cruelly, but I was proud to bear it. Incredibly proud.
 
The Cross is slow, a voice in my head told me, the Cross has patience, infinite patience. It deploys its greatest strength slowly - Time, Lisette, it is Time that will conquer you. Time and the Cross together, Lisette, those two together are stronger than you. You cannot escape them. They will test you, Lisette, they will torture you, they will slowly work on you until you’re squirming in agony. You can’t do anything to resist them, you'll have to experience it.
"The way you looked up there, Lisette! At the end as if you were in ecstasy, you looked like a saint."

There are great passages in each of these chapters.

This story has a lot to say, a lot to teach. The cross experience, revealed, gloried in.
 
Back again! Just a little to pick up the story again ...

5 With unshod feet

I got dressed. "No shoes," said Doro immediately, "You stay barefoot!" Well, why not? I pulled on my dark, knee-length skirt and cream-colored summer blouse. When I went to pick up my panties, Dorothea snatched them away, "You don’t need those either!" Okay - unless we’re going to the supermarket .... Feeling lighthearted, I said that out loud. Dorothea looked at me with her head aside, "Supermarket," she murmured, "hmm ...."

I stretched and stretched myself, the half-hour on the cross had made a new me, it was a great sensation, feeling what I’d passed through, it filled me with pride. And this afternoon I’d experience the same again, I was so looking forward to it!

Dorothea went to her desk. There were notebooks and sketch-pads neatly stacked, brushes and paints, crayons and pencils. She looked up at me, threw a glance at my bare feet, and began to grin. She motioned with her index finger: "Come here, Lisette!" I went to her. My cousin looked at me from head to toe. "Hmm .... you look pretty, Lisette, so summery, a really nice girl. But is this girl also good?" She looked me straight in the eye. "Tell me, Lisette, are you a brave girl? " "I .... uh .... think so ...." I said, I didn’t quite know what answer she expected. "That was a bit slow, my love!" Doro looked at me sternly “Now, are you a well-behaved girl or not?" I shuffled from one foot to the other. "Er, yes… how? I don’t know.... How do you mean, Dorothea?" She sighed, "Not very good! No." She shook her head, as if she were dealing with a hopeless case. "Get this clear, Lisette. This training is very special, you understand?” I nodded eagerly, "It is something very special!"

“In a little while,” my cousin went on, “it might be really fun to tie you up and just leave you. But there will come a time when you – to put it bluntly – won’t give a fuck for ropes. Every athlete has her own baser instincts, they need to be conquered - with discipline." Dorothea was standing in front of me, looking away. "Discipline, my love, is nothing other than obedience. She who is obedient, is good. Do you follow me?" "Yes," I said. What was she up to? "So we must also train you in obedience."

She turned to me. "We’ll start right away. Hands behind your back!"I obeyed without hesitation."Turn around!" I turned my back to her. "Go to the wall, where the ropes are hanging!" I walked across and remained standing before the ropes. "The rope to the right of you," said Doro, "the one that in this light looks almost white. Bring it to me!"

"STOP!" she shouted, as I went to take hold of the rope with my right hand. "No-one has said anything about you being allowed to take your hands off your bum!" Hastily I crossed my wrists again behind my back. "Bring me the rope, Lisette!" snarled Dorothea. How, if I’m not allowed to touch it!? "I'm waiting!" snapped my cousin sharply, "Lisette, what have you got in your head? Bring me the rope! Get on with it!" I could think of no other way to grasp the rope except with my mouth. I had to stand on my toes to get it off the hook. Like a dog I with a stick, I brought my cousin the rope. "That took a long time," Dorothea said, "were you asleep?" "No" I said, with the rope in my mouth, it sounded like "nnngaow" "What are you thinking of," grumbled Dorothea, "speaking with your mouth full? Don’t you dare do that again! Put the rope on the table!” I obeyed.

Doro shook her head. "Really, Lisette, you're a hopeless case. I really don’t want any more of this crap. Why should I do you the favour of tying you up permanently, if you're so bloody stupid? Bind yourself to the cross, I don’ want any more to do with it!” "No," I cried, startled, "no, Dorothea! Don’t do that! Please shackle me on it! Please!" She looked at me ungraciously, "Why should I?" "Please, Doro," I begged, "please do it!"She wrinkled her nose, "Oh yeah? What for? What’s in it for me? You get the pleasure and I do the work! I have to tie you, haul you up, let you down, untie you, give you instructions. I have to do everything and you - you pretend to be stupid! No, I think I’ve had enough…" "No Dorothea," I cried, "Don’t!"
 
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She looked at me for a long time. I was still holding my wrists crossed behind my back, silent as I stood before her. "Do you want to be my captive, and to be kept in training?" she demanded at last. I nodded vigorously, "Yes!" "Yes, what?" I looked at her stupidly. She shook her head, "You’re doing just as badly again! Your brain's rotting - no, worse than that - bread can go mouldy, you can’t even manage that!" "What am I supposed to say?" I asked, weeping, "do tell me, please!"

"Look at me!" ordered Dorothea, "look at me!" I looked at her."Well," she asked, "what do you see? Holey socks? A freight train? A dunghill? A street lamp?""I-I-I see you," I stammered. "And why do you act as if I were a chair? A bus? A towel? A bicycle?" I stared at her blankly."What sets me apart from all the things that I’ve just listed?" she snarled unpleasantly. I thought feverishly. A freight train. A bus. A bike. "You’ve got no wheels?" I cried eagerly. Dorothea’s eyes widened, she dropped into a chair. "I cannot believe it," she said, and clutched at her head. "Brain rot! In the most advanced stages! Incurable!" "What?" I squeaked.

Dorothea got up and stood in front of me. "Unlike the things that I have listed, I have a name! Get it?" "Yes" I said. Slap! She hit me, glared sternly at me,"Get it ???" I swallowed. Then it rang a bell. "Yes, Dorothea," I said meekly. My cheek burned. "By all the gods on Olympus!" snorted Doro, "that took some doing! In the future you'll address me by my name, understand?" "Yes, Dorothea," I replied hastily. She looked at me, a long time, silently, without a word piercing my eyes with hers. I swallowed hard.

"All right," she muttered, "I’ll give you one last chance, Lisette. Kneel before me and ask me for it, if you still want to be trained.” I dropped to my knees, hands still behind my back, and looked humbly up at her. "Please train me further, Dorothea. Please hold me captive. Please educate me. Please let me practise enduring pain. Please go on with it, Dorothea."

She looked down on me sternly, "Are you going to be a good girl Lisette?" "Yes, Dorothea." "Will you obey me without protest and without asking any stupid questions, Lisette?" "Yes, Dorothea." "Even if I demand things from you that you don’t want to do, Lisette?" "Yes, Dorothea." I said yes and amen to everything she wanted.

In any case, I wanted my bondage training increased, I was willing to do anything to continue regularly being bound on the cross. "Please don’t say no, Dorothea," I pleaded. She took it all with prolonged relish, she was making me small, and I was wondering silently why I was liking it. It just felt more and more right for me to be kneeling in front of my cousin and promising to do everything she asked of me.
 
some tricky bits in this, involving word-play in German which I can only translate by substituting comparable bits of English -
but it's another enjoyable twist in the tale :p


"Well," she said at last, "get up!"I got up."Let's continue with our fun class. Turn around." I obeyed. "Hands behind your back, forearms crossed over tight against each other!" Immediately I did what she asked. Dorothea took the rope and tied my arms, wrapping it around my wrists, tying a knot, then winding it around again and again. She tied my arms so tightly together that it hurt, the bonds were extremely tight. I liked it, oh, and how! It was so nicely restricting.

Doro gave me a nudge. "On the table with you!" She pointed to the table next to her painting desk. I sat with my naked bum on the table. "Right up!" "Yes, Dorothea." I climbed onto the table, put my bare feet on the smooth wooden surface, and waited. Dorothea dug out a booklet from the stack on her work table. It was a simple exercise book in A5 format, lined. She placed it in front of me. "You’re going to write a dictation for me, Lisette, so let's start now." I stared at the book and tugged at my arm-bondage. How? "Open your book, Lisette!" I looked at my cousin helplessly. Dorothea rolled her eyes. "What’s the matter now?! I think I'll get one of those chimpanzees from the zoo! She’d be more capable of learning than you are! Open the notebook!" I tried to lean forward far enough so that I could open the exercise-book with my lips."Back!" snarled Dorothea viciously. "What are you fidgeting for in the classroom ?! Kindly sit still, pupil!" She tapped on the book, "Open it, go on!”I stuck out my right foot and tried it with my toes. It didn’t work. "Gawd!" grumbled Dorothea, "whatever will become of you, Lisette ?!" She put her hands on her hips. "For the last time, will you open this book!?" I tried, in vain, again it didn’t work."I'm going straight to the pool and I’ll let you just sit here," threatened my cousin. I tried feverishly, again and again I grabbed at the book, tried to flip it open. It didn’t work. I was using only one foot, was that the problem? I moved my left foot to the spine and held it firmly, then with my right foot, I carefully turned the thick cardboard cover. It worked! The book fell open. I sighed with relief.

Dorothee looked at me. "If you taken that long in the Wild West to load your rifle and point it at a bear who was running towards you and calling you "breakfast", you’d have been eaten, digested and crapped out again before you'd done it. Now pick up that pencil and write!" The pencil. It was an extra thick one, triangular, no hard edges, it was nicely rounded. I fumbled at it with my toes. No good. Again. Again, still no good. Don’t give up, Lisette. As my hero Goethe says, "Success has two letters, DO, so if something gives you trouble DO it!!" I did it. With both feet I managed to find a way, I stuck the pencil between my big toe and the next one and put my right foot on the notebook.

"Here we go," said Dorothea. She began to dictate. "Lisette was a foolish and disobedient girl. She was never good. She gave her poor teacher nothing but trouble with her clumsiness." I was desperate to write with my right foot, it was exorbitantly difficult, harder than I’d ever imagined. The letters wandered crazily across the page like a crazy mountain-railway. The lines marked on the paper were at best a guide. Dorothea my stern teacher sighed and grumbled about me all the time. She kept shaking her head and snorting indignantly, "By all the gods of Olympus," she lamented again and again.

Finally, the dictation was over. One page was filled with garbled, tangled-up letters. My teacher took the book. She grabbed a red crayon from her work-table and began to correct it." She opened her eyes wide."What does that mean? A dum girl? Dum? You really are dumb!" She stretched out the “–umm”. "Lisette Lange is a dumb girl! And here! And there! Are we dyslexic??" Without pity she ran through each of my spelling errors. Except for the missing b in ‘dumb’, there were no real mistakes, I’m good at grammar, I just hadn’t formed the letters correctly.

I had just written my first barefoot dictation. Normally I use my right hand to write with, not my right foot. "Nine Mistakes!" snarled Dorothea. "You'll write it out again, little miss!" She presented me with the book and went over to the wall, came back with a stick in her hand and began to dictate. I cast a nervous glance at the little stick. It was thirty inches long and as thick as my little finger. Gradually it was becoming quite uncomfortable with my arms tied so tightly behind my back., Dorothea had tied me really firmly, it pinched and squeezed meanly, the knotted ropes were constricting my blood.

So now I must write nicely with my foot. With my foot! I was getting used to writing with my bare foot, it was going quite well... "Error!" cried Dorothea, and hit her stick on the sole."Ow," I screamed and jumped. "Wake-up time, little schoolgirl!" said Dorothy, "Next! Lisette Lange was a silly girl! Dum, without the b!" I wrote "Lisette Lange was a silly girl. "Dang! Dorothea whisked the stick across my toes, "Ouch!"I shouted, that hurt, but it was good. I checked my writing, the letters were wobbling like a drunken man across the page, but I hadn’t made any mistakes. Thwack ! Dorothea gave me another blow to the sole of my foot, very firmly. "You're going to be punished for that!" "B-but ...." I stammered “I haven’t written it all yet... "Peng ! That was another on my sensitive toes. I yelped, tears were coming into my eyes. "Well you should have have!” cried Dorothea, "Go on! Write, you silly imp, or I'll give you a full-length novel to copy out as your punishment." I looked at the paper. "Lisette Lange was a silly girl," was already there. I lifted my foot and wrote after it, “Dum without b.” "You’ve missed out THE!" Doro rolled her eyes.

Mercilessly, she rushed me on through the dictation. For each mistake I made, I received a solid blow with the stick, either on the sole of my foot or on my toes, it hurt as much either way. The bondage behind my back, fixing my forearms together, was burning, constricting my circulation, it really hurt.

Finally it was done. Dorothea checked the result. "Six errors," she said, "and this dreadful writing! For that you get seven black marks!" She put the booklet in front of me, "Start on a new page!" I first had to put aside the pencil. With both feet I fiddled with the tricky notebook until I succeeded in opening a new page. Among other artistic contortions, I put the pencil back again between my big toe and the next one. "You will write independently now," Dorothea said, "Six times, one line after the other, you will write: I HAVE MADE SIX MISTAKES IN MY DICTATION. FOR MY PUNISHMENT I AM TO GET SIX TIMES TEN STROKES OF THE STICK ON MY BARE SOLES, SIGNED, LISETTE."

I set to work, with her words burning my ears - sixty lashes on my bare feet. Sixty! My heart was beating fast. When I was finally finished with writing, Dorothea untied my arm-bondage. I stretched, my hands began to tingle as the blood flowed back where the bondage had cut it off. Dorothea was by the wall. "Bring the ropes, Lisette!" She put her hands on her hips. "What you looking at? Do you think I’m going to drag myself over there with all the stuff ?! You're the one who wants to be tied up, so come on!" She showed me which ropes I had to take, and investigated in a corner, poking around among the pieces of cut-off wood until she found a stick. It was finger-thick anda metre long. I looked at the thing suspiciously. So I’ll be getting my sixty strokes with that on my bare soles... "Off to the house with you," ordered my cousin, "Yes, Dorothea," I said submissively. We went back into the house.
 
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