• Sign up or login, and you'll have full access to opportunities of forum.

Sadism and compassion

Go to CruxDreams.com
Interesting perspective. It's a meme at this point to view porn, especially Hentai, for "the plot."
That said I have seen productions, even photo shoots that have text accompanying it, with a production value to rival Hollywood films.
The written story seems to be more applicable to setting up a background for the characters, plot, settings and situations. Probably why they are so popular on this forum.

As long as plot and background serve the sexual content. Though it would be interesting to write a story about a sub or dom as to why they are the way they are, it would not fit this forum I think. It would probably become a novel that can me mainstream. But I'd really hope it would be something better than several shades of grey.

More often than not when a writer or creator speaks more on why the acts happening to the characters and which characters perspective is being talked about most they are projecting their own desires and thought processes.

Absolutely. Which is something a writer should be conscious of.

When I was involved with a sex group back in college we practiced acting out all kinds of fantasies and fetishes. An idea that one of the heads of the group proposed was to keep a written account of what each participant was feeling and experiencing throughout our various sessions. i remember that, for me anyway, I spoke a great deal more on when I was in the dominant position. Usually,

Wait, you had a sex group in college? Damn, I was born in the wrong time and place it seems.

in my experience, the "victim" is doing this to fulfill sexual desires, which can be interesting to hear about, but honestly it can only be taken so far. Their are tons and tons of stories that detail how the victim starts out despising every second of the ordeal and by the end they are essentially brain dead by how satisfying the torture is.

I find it very interesting to know about the experiences of a sub and also to hear something about motivation. And I do care about the experience being satsifying for all. Though in my stories I fully skip that to be honest - in fantasy I can pretend the feelings of the victim don't matter.
 
Now this is one style I can't be doing with at all - possibly because I lack a real sub side, or possibly because I'm very averse to pain and discomfort myself. For me, pain is pain and pleasure is pleasure - there's little room for masochist victims. But a lot of people really get off on the victim getting off.
The real skill in being a dom is satisfying the sub without causing actual agony or pain.
As long as plot and background serve the sexual content. Though it would be interesting to write a story about a sub or dom as to why they are the way they are, it would not fit this forum I think. It would probably become a novel that can me mainstream. But I'd really hope it would be something better than several shades of grey.



Absolutely. Which is something a writer should be conscious of.



Wait, you had a sex group in college? Damn, I was born in the wrong time and place it seems.



I find it very interesting to know about the experiences of a sub and also to hear something about motivation. And I do care about the experience being satsifying for all. Though in my stories I fully skip that to be honest - in fantasy I can pretend the feelings of the victim don't matter.
To answer the first question: Yes I was in a sex and swingers group when I was in college. I got connected to them through the website AdultFreindFinder.
The Subs motivation is primarily just fulfillment of sexual gratification or out of sexual curiosity born from inexperience. That is if the sub has a health mindset going into the relationship. The other side of this comes from...........................yeah, I'm not going into that right now.
 
The real skill in being a dom is satisfying the sub without causing actual agony or pain.

To answer the first question: Yes I was in a sex and swingers group when I was in college. I got connected to them through the website AdultFreindFinder.
The Subs motivation is primarily just fulfillment of sexual gratification or out of sexual curiosity born from inexperience. That is if the sub has a health mindset going into the relationship. The other side of this comes from...........................yeah, I'm not going into that right now.
You hit the nail on the head with that statement. Being a long time sub, I am an orgasm addict. I let people molest me and submit to embarasment and humiliation because it gives me intense gratification .
 
As long as plot and background serve the sexual content. Though it would be interesting to write a story about a sub or dom as to why they are the way they are, it would not fit this forum I think. It would probably become a novel that can me mainstream. But I'd really hope it would be something better than several shades of grey.
I think it could well start her and then, if successful, go mainstream.
I find it very interesting to know about the experiences of a sub and also to hear something about motivation. And I do care about the experience being satsifying for all. Though in my stories I fully skip that to be honest - in fantasy I can pretend the feelings of the victim don't matter.
I think the feelings of fantasy victims matter very much - just in perhaps a quite different way to those of real subs.

The real skill in being a dom is satisfying the sub without causing actual agony or pain.
Certainly in BDSM. But then, I don't usually enjoy stories or fantasies about BDSM. (Sometimes, though...)
 
I think the feelings of fantasy victims matter very much - just in perhaps a quite different way to those of real subs.
A real sub deserves aftercare, she's a real person, not a victim or an object 24/7. In fantasy that doesn't matter, especially not when the victim in the story is killed.
 
A real sub deserves aftercare, she's a real person, not a victim or an object 24/7. In fantasy that doesn't matter, especially not when the victim in the story is killed.
I mean, yeah, of course a real sub would need some kind of aftercare. By that logic we might have written an entire life story containing every single minutia of the subs life. lol
Or we can just read about/watch a sub, both in fantasy and in live action productions get fucked, sexually tortured , jack off to it, call it a day, and carry on with the rest of our day afterward. lol
 
I mean, yeah, of course a real sub would need some kind of aftercare. By that logic we might have written an entire life story containing every single minutia of the subs life. lol
Or we can just read about/watch a sub, both in fantasy and in live action productions get fucked, sexually tortured , jack off to it, call it a day, and carry on with the rest of our day afterward. lol
I'm sure each of these appeal to different sorts of people. And some even like both.
 
Another bit of musing on this topic...
Someone once asked me, why do I hate women? But I do not hate women at all. In fact, I love the female body. Why then do I get this longing to hurt that lovely body, I often wonder? I do not get aroused by inflicting pain as such. Stabbing needles under her fingernails does nothing for me and I certainly would not get aroused by pulling a tooth. I do get aroused when flogging her sensitive inner thighs, her breasts and her vulva. I can also enjoy pushing needles into nipples and breasts and through labia. In fact, I get aroused by torturing those bodyparts that are attractive to me. I would not get aroused by torturing a man's body, because his body doesn't attract me. In short I must conclude that I enjoy hurting that which attracts me. As if I need to punish it for arousing me. And when I do punish it, in fantasy or in real life, I then feel the need to offer comfort afterwards, to carress that which has suffered from my arousal.
I am sure this is different for other people, but some will probably recognize this. Nobody is the same and there's no single form of sexuality. One of the reasons why I enjoy reading this forum, is the multitude of perversions I notice here. In enjoy reading people's fantasies, even when they don't arouse me. It helps me get to terms with my own kink as it were.
I see what your saying and feel much the same. Though I have engaged in a far wider range of tortures to female (only) bodies they all seem somehow related to her as a sexual being of attractiveness. Interesting that you ponder the same.
 
Mutual exclusive? Not in my experience.

I notice two kinds of stories here, two types of crucifixion and/or torture stories. Those that focus on the acts of violence and those that focus on the victim, who she is, what she is suffering and especially, how innocent or guilty she really is. To me the second type is more interesting. Why, I wondered recently? It has to do with meaning. I would not get excited from whipping a cow or kicking a dog. It is without meaning. It's not the inflicted pain I enjoy in a bdsm or snuff story. It's the suffering I enjoy. That's also why I do not focus on the person holding the whip, in my stories I focus on the victim and her suffering. And she can only suffer if the pain has meaning to her. Which means I also have to feel compassion in order for my sadism to kick in. The victims in my stories need to have names, some form of background and a kind of response that makes it possible to feel sorry for them. On the other hand the bad guy also needs to be more than a cardboard figure, so you can feel the disgust of the victim for him. I am still trying to understand this, but it has to do with contrast I think. No darkness or shadow without some form of light. No pain without sensitivity. Usually I want to cuddle the girl that suffered - I even have that with bdsm situations in real life. It's like I can't enjoy inflicting pain if I do not care for the victim.

Does this sound familiar? Any other views on this?
Agree-victim must have a back story or the torture is simply without context and meaning. I believe inflicting torture then wanting to comfort the victim is a well studied type of sadism. I too love the form and personae of a certain type of woman. I think it is a form of objectivication, which I've decided I'm comfortable with in that in real life I treat all women with respect and see them as whole people. I compartmentalize.
 
Back
Top Bottom