Part 9
The soldiers step back and let me struggle and scream. They admire their handiwork and smile as they watch three of us struggle. I can’t flail my legs anymore, and instead I scream and jerk. I tried to take the pressure off my wrists, by rising upward, using the muscles in my bent legs to do it. Once again, I scream from the new pain in my feet.
I can only hold myself upward for a short while, and as I do so the pain from the spikes in my feet shoots up and down my legs. I gasp in agony, total agony, that seems to have no limit and certainly no end as I fall again and hang from my wrists. I jerk upward once again, and then again and again.
The crowd is watching, and they giggle as I fight the cross. They are enjoying my crucifixion and are happy to see my misery. Three of us struggle in our individual misery, yet side by side, each jerking up and down as we shift our pain from feet to the wrists to feet to wrists.
Small signs announcing our crime are placed over our heads and after that there is nothing left to do but to watch and to wait. We struggle like three wild men, the pain making us panic to find some position for relief. Of course, there is no relief for us.
After about twenty minutes I look at the crowd and saw a young man that I saw while I was carrying the patibulum to an execution place, he followed me up until the cross, he can see my suffering and seem to be really interested in my experience. He locks eyes with me for a minute. Then he watches me as I use my leg muscles and push myself upward, my chest heaving then. In his eyes I see myself, because only few weeks ago I was looking at the crucified man and wonder how he was feeling. I hold myself in that position, wincing from the pain for several long seconds, and then, my thigh muscles give out and I fall down defeated and gasp as my wrists take the strain at the nails.
I constantly have trouble breathing, the struggle is real, lifting myself up every few minutes. I must rise up to exhale and to breathe, and so I had to suffer the pain of it every time I do it. Each time I push up on the nailed feet it causes searing bolts of agony to travel up my legs.
I looked in the crowd and I notice couple young girls in their twenties who were looking back at me. They seemed to be really interested in me and my young naked body as I dance on the cross. They watch every move of my body.
Carlos and Daniel, the men crucified next to me, jerk up and down and up and down, fast, as if trying to shake themselves from the cross. Full of total panic, screaming, jerking and slamming head again and again and again into the post.
Then I notice her, it was Sofia, she was standing to the left in the crowd. I couldn’t mistake her for anyone else, she is so beautiful. Tears started coming from my eyes realizing that she must witness my suffering, I knew that her heart was broken seeing me nailed naked to the cross. She didn’t take her eyes off me. She can see my nailed wrists and feet and watch as my body moves constantly trying to find relief. It was a strange feeling to know that the love of my love sees me in such agony and pain.
The day was coming to an end and darkness started to cover the Golgotha. Most of the people left, the soldiers set up a fire pit as they were ordered to guards us until we die. The pain was unbearable, but the initial shock was over. I can see the suffering of other two prisoners who hang naked on their crosses right next to me. We hang in silence, everyone in their own deep thought. I was thinking of Sofia, I wanted her to be safe, she is such an incredible and beautiful girl.
As the morning comes and I see the sunrise, hour after hour, minute after minute, I writhed in agony. I tried desperately to catch my breath, but somehow, it never seemed to happen. The sharp pain in my wrists and feet had slowly become a dull throb. It seemed to get better at night when the cold penetrated my body and dulled my senses. I drifted in and out of consciousness but was never able to fall asleep.
In the morning I notice that the soldiers were guiding another victim to be crucified. As I look closer, I couldn’t believe it was SOFIA.
“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO” I screamed.
She was only wearing a small loin cloth and was carrying the heavy plank of wood set heavily on her shoulders. I couldn’t tear my eyes from her small and beautiful body.
She arrived at a pole right in front of me. The soldiers pushed her on her back. She kept looking at me and I didn’t take my eyes of her. My heart was beating so fast I though it is going to jump out my chest. The soldier made short work of nailing her small hands to the rough plank of wood. I never took my eyes away from her as the nails crushed her small wrists. I was desperately hoping I might provide some comfort from the agony she must be experiencing. Her bare feet shuffled back and forth in the dirt as she writhed in agony.
The guards quickly hoisted Sofia up by her nailed wrists. Her legs dangled in the air as she was lifted high in the sky, then dropped onto the top of the post. She let out a long, cry of pain and anguish. Looking over, Sofia’s long, brown hair hung over her eyes. I could see she was fighting for breath too. It took only three devastating blows from the hammer to drive the iron spike through both of Sofia’s feet and into the wood. The scream of pain came from deep within Sofia’s lungs.
Sofia had pushed her body up a few inches, relieving the strain on her arms. She was looking at me like she was telling me, “I’m here for you”.
I couldn’t believe it, she was crucified in front of me, my love, my everything. She was hanging naked, her body was so beautiful, she was constantly moving her body trying to grab air to breath.
“Please, NOOOOOO, let her go” I screamed from the top of my lungs.
I closed my eyes for a minute, when I open my eyes Sofia was not there anymore.
“Finish them” I heard the order from Centurion “they began to hallucinate already”
Three of us were still alive. The guard raised his club and with two quick blows, shattered Carlos legs. Then the guard was looking up at me. I watched as he took aim at my legs and swung his club. I barely felt my legs breaking. The breathing become hard and soon everything became dark and it was all over. The death was the ending result of Rufus’ journey to crucifixion.
The End
