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Lassie-hunting In The Northern Forest

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According to Merriam-Webster.com

1: sodomite
2 a: a worthless person : rascal
b: fellow, chap
3: a small or annoying thing <put down my keys and now I can't find the buggers>
Origin of BUGGER
Middle English bougre heretic, from Anglo-French bugre, from Medieval Latin Bulgarus, literally, Bulgarian; from the association of Bulgaria with the Bogomils, who were accused of sodomy
First Known Use: 1555

The Bogomils were a Gnostic Christian sect.
The verb form can mean "to have anal sex". In phrases like:"bugger off" or "bugger me sideways", it can be used as substitute for "fuck": "fuck off", "fuck me sideways".
Growing up in the American South, I often heard persons refered to as "an onery bugger" or "an ugly bugger". I doubt if anyone was aware of the sexual conotation.
 
16

It’s a grand procession, the Braw Lad on his fine stallion carrying the Burgh standard, and several other red-coated riders from the Merrick Hunt, then the pipes and drums, a parcel of cheerleaders down from Glasgow, high-kicking, baton-twirling, flashing their frilly knickers, and behind them us linkies, paraded in triumph by our capturing callants.

Sandy conducts me, holding my arm in the firm grip of his left hand. His whip – I guess it’s been his dad’s and many generations of McConchie’s before – is in his right. I whisper “Yaise yer whup, Sandy ye needna be blate[1] – owww!” He didn’t need much telling! I skip as he stings the my thighs with flicks in time to the band.

A big crowd in the High Street, enjoying the afternoon. As we go up by Kirkside, there’s not so many, mostly Japanese tourists and white settlers from England giggling and taking snaps of our quaint local custom, but most of the douce[2] residents peer at us from behind their starched net curtains.

Outside the Academy, a gang of Wullie’s friends chant “Braw cubbie!” mockingly as soon as they spot me, jeering in delight – my triumph as a fourteen-year-old still rankles, this is their moment of revenge. I hold my head up, glance at Sandy who’s looking annoyed, whisper, “Dinna fash[3] yersel aboot them, they dinna bother me,” then I look straight ahead pretending to ignore them, though I can feel myself blushing right down to my bare breasts.

There’s a rough crowd down by the Bridge Hotel too, pals of old man McRae, fellow-lodgers with him in Barlinnie I don’t doubt. Their coarse comments on our female assets are hardly coherent, far from clever, but raise roars of drunken laughter – I’m urged to swing my arse so they can see my pussy, what the hell I think, and swivel my hips compliantly, this earns me a cheer.

And so we come back to the High Street and up to the Tolbooth,[4] where Baillie Rutherford awaits us in his ceremonial gown and chain of office, at the head of the old stone stairway. The horses, band and cheerleaders are lined up either side of the Toun Square, we step along briskly to ‘Bonnie Gallowa’, a tune that’s better for skipping than marching, but it gets us girls swinging our kilties.

As we take our postions for the closing ceremony, I see Mam, Dad, Alisdair and Nyn near the Tolbooth steps, giving me a wave, I grin back. After formal greetings and a vacuous speech, Baillie Rutherford has to enquire whether each of us linkies ‘gave a good run.’ Mollie’s led up first, still looking glum, no callants to escort her, Major Morton has to accompany her up the steps and give the formal assurance, “Aye, Sir, to the best of my knowledge and belief, she gave a guid run.”

There’s a round of applause as she returns to their place. Sheila’s next, she’s led up by Malcolm, he’s a fit young man, I think she’ll be happy enough to have been takken by him – if she has a baby, there’ll be no argument about who’s it is, and though under the Ordinar o the Rug he’s not obliged to accept any responsibility, he’s the kind who will want to see the kid’s okay. He announces clearly, “Aye, she gied a guid rin.”

And now it’s me. Sandy leads me up the steps, there’s a chorus of wolf-whistles and more jeers of “braw cubbie”. I’m conscious how much of my underparts can be seen from below, but I stand as I should, legs planted well apart, head up, breasts lifted, giving Lieutenant-Colonel (retired) Baillie Rutherford a sweet smile.

[1] Blate = shy, timid.
[2] Douce = refined, posh.
[3] Fash = bother, trouble.
[4] Tolbooth = Town Hall.
 
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17

“Did this linkie give a good run?” he asks grandly, “Aye, Sir, she did,” replies Sandy. “Nae she didna!” a voice yells from the Square. I know it’s Wullie. The Baillie looks startled, and displeased, there’s an outbreak of murmuring In the crowd as he leans to the microphone and demands “Who said that?” “A did, Sir,” Wullie’s climbing the steps now.

“Are you making a complaint against this linkie?” asks the Baillie, with an impatient scowl. “Aye, a am, Sir.” “And what is your complaint?” “Three complaints, Sir –“ the Baillie frowns. “First, the linkie an her freends laid a foil –“ “A false trail?” “Aye, they’d scugged fuid in a cubbie-den, an that misled oor dugs.”[1] The baillie looks sceptical, there’s a cry of “Rubbage!” and a good deal of muttering in the crowd.

“And the second complaint?” “She hunker’d afore she had ony need. That wis snuilin.”[2] There’s a gasp from the crowd, I feel Sandy’s grip on my arm tighten instinctively at this shock – being accused of laying a foil is serious enough, but snuilin is a shameful, humiliating charge, my cheeks are burning, I feel hot tears in my eyes. The Baillie himself looks shaken.

“And the third?” “She gied ower fechtin afore she’n bin richtly takken. That wis snuilin tae.”[3] There’s a commotion in the crowd, people are shouting, the gang of McRae’s prison-mates are below the steps, just under me, I can hear them yelling abuse at most of the rest of the crowd, who sound as shocked as I am. One of the couple of police on duty is trying to impose some order, her colleague’s shouting into his mobile, calling for assistance. As for Sandy, his grip on me is still iron, but he’s shaking, white with fury, I’m afraid he’s going to stride across and punch Wullie.

“Order!” shouts the Lieutenant-Colonel, I’d always thought him a bit of a pompous ass, but on this occasion he has a presence and power about him that speaks authority. Things quieten enough for him to declare, “These are very serious complaints you are making, Wullie McRae. Are you sure you have good grounds for them?” Wullie’s looking down at his feet, shuffling them awkwardly, obviously he’s been put up to this nonsense by his dad and his evil pals, but he mumbles, “Aye, Sir… a hae groonds…”

“Well,” announces the Baillie, “These complaints will have to be heard formally immediately after the end of this ceremony. In accordance with the customs and Ordinar o the Rug, the linkie will have no right to speak for herself, neither will any female, but a man who can do, and is willing to, may speak for her.”

Wullie hurries off down the steps, not daring to look at anybody till he reaches his dad with his gang of mates, the policeman and woman are watching them sternly. Sandy leads me down, Mam and Dad are waiting at the bottom, I burst into tears. Sandy unlocks the handcuffs – not strictly allowed yet, but even the McRae’s aren’t going to add that to my list of offences! Mam gives me a handful of tissues, and a big hug, saying “Dinna greet lassie, dinna let them see ye greetin…” “Amna feart,” I sob, “A’m jist bleezin… hoo daur they ca me a cooard?” “Ye’re nae cooard, Lulie,” I hear Sandy say, “ye’re a bonnie fechter, ye’ll show thaim!”[4]

But it’s Anna’s turn now, she gives me a supportive smile as Major Morton leads her to the steps, the linkie of the Baillie-Rug. As Maister o’the Whup he declares that she “gave a guid run”, and he’s presented with a sash in the Baillie-Rug sett to place on her right shoulder, it looks nice with her kiltie, swinging across her shapely, scarred breasts. She gets a good cheer as she descends and perches on the step beside me.

Dad has been in deep conversation with Jock and Sandy. We all look up, expecting the Baillie to summon me up for the hearing, but Major Morton has another announcement to make. “I have to inform you, Baillie Sir, and all gathered here, that there is another linkie on whom I must report.

Miss Una MacGillivray, a burgh-lassie, was rugged by a private, licensed rugger named Mr. Polivanov…”

Una! We’re all listening anxiously, what’s happened to her? “To the best of my knowledge and belief, Sir, she gave a good run. As Mr. Polivanov’s dogs were chasing her, she ran out across the mud in the estuary to the Rum Rocks. The dogs caught her there, but Mr. Polivanov got into difficulties with the soft mud and the incoming tide. Luckily, his shouts, the linkie’s cries, and the dogs’ barking attracted the attention of Fred Stewart and his son, who were out fishing on the far side of the bay, they called the Coastguard. Mr. Polivanov was rescued by the inshore lifeboat, but the linkie was found to be in urgent need of medical care, she’d been so badly savaged by the dogs. The Air-Sea Rescue helicopter took her to Loreburn General Hospital, where she is in intensive care. I’ve heard that her parents are with her, and her condition is described as serious but stable.”

A shocked hush descends on the Square. Lieutenant-Colonel Rutherford is silent for a good couple of minutes, before speaking in a strained tone. “Well, thankyou, Maister. I’m sure we all wish the linkie a good and speedy recovery, and thank all those involved in the rescue. Do we have any information about Mr. Poli.. er .. the gentleman?” “He and his friend, who took the linkie Mollie Burns, are reported to have left their lodgings at midday. The dogs were impounded by the Police, I understand they will have to be put down, as very dangerous animals.”

The Baillie frowns, “H’m, I think the Rug Committee needs to tighten up procedures for issuing licences to strangers.” The Maister’s face when he hears that is a picture! After another pause for the shaft to sink in, the Baillie declares, “Again, we wish the lassie well. It may be a little early to say this, but perhaps it will help her to get better – it would seem to me that, as she was rugged but not takken, we should deem that she was ‘given the best’, and so she should be declared a Braw Linkie!” A cheer roars up. “Do you agree, Maister o’the Whup?” “Aye, Sir,” says the Major, grumpily, “I do.”




[1] The linkie and her friends laid a false trail. they hid food in a cubbie-den, and that misled our dogs.

[2] She signalled surrender before she had any need to, that was cowardly.

[3] She gave up fighting before she’d been properly captured, that was cowardly too.

[4] Don’t cry, girl, don’t let them see you cry. I’m not frightened, I’m just furious – how dare they call me a coward? You’re no coward, you’re a fine fighter, you’ll show them!
 
...as a writer I prefer short comments like yours than just a batch of likes...
so I've given you a 'like' :p
it is encouraging, I agree,
but remember not everyone is as ready with things to say as you always are! :D
 
oh, just noticed, I should have had a footnote explaining Rum Rocks, maybe Gaelic rùm = 'broad'
(but round our coast, smuggling was literally the main economic activity in the 18th century ;))​
 
...as a writer I prefer short comments like yours than just a batch of likes...

Comments are nice, and so are likes :)
There is often so much to catch up with, and not always time to leave a considered response.
One way or another, please do let people know that their contributions are appreciated.
 
18

“Now,” the Baillie announces, “we have to hear the complaints made against linkie Lulie MacAlister.“ he turns and beckons me, “Come up here, linkie!” Sandy locks the handcuffs back on my wrists, and leads me up the steps. The Baillie points to where we should stand, at the far end of the platform, to his right. Now he summons Wullie, he’s with the McRae gang. There are half-a-dozen police in the square now, two more patrol cars have arrived, one of the offficers has a posh hat and stars on her lapels, must be important, and she’s keeping a very stern eye on the McRaes. Wullie stands to the Baillie’s left, scowling across the platform at us.

“Will any man speak for the linkie?” askes the Baillie. “Aye, Sir, a’ll spik fer her,” says Sandy – I’m a wee bit surprised, I thought Dad might insist on speaking for me, but Sandy’s the best witness, and I’m very happy he’s taking the side of his linkie so loyally. “Very well, Sandy McConchie. What have you to say about the first complaint, of thristin, impeding the rug, by laying a foil?”

“Sir, it’s true that the game-burds had skooked some fuid in a cubbie-den, bit yon fuid wis a in plastic boxes, there wisna ony smell frae it. Oor dugs were misled and follaed a line tae the den, bit that wis the burds’ ain drag they were follaeing, it wisna the fuid.”[1]

The Baillie listens carefully, and nods. “What of the second complaint, that she hunkered before she needed to? Please tell us how long she’d been running. ” “A canna gie the exack times, Sir, bit a ken ma Dad an me, wi the McRaes and the McCullochs, cam intae the Forest by Gallows Gate jist afoor eight. It wus twenty minutes or so afore oor dugs snoked the drag o the linkies.”[2] “So that’s when the dug-rin[3] began?” “Aye, Sir. Oor dugs follaed the line tae a place whaur the linkies must hae had a pee, then doon tae the Back Burn. We were checked[4] a wee while there, an the McCullochs heided awa upstream. Bit we an the McRae’s picked up the line tae the den whaur the fuid was. It wis anely then we heerd the ‘Vizzie-hoo’[5]” “How long do you think the linkies had been running then?” “Och, a’d say a guid hauf-oor, Sir. We heeded up tae the tap o the wuid. Whan we got oot frae the cover, we saw the linkies had scrammeld – the McCullochs were areedy ruggin ane o thaim, bit we cud see anither rinnin towards the Rig o Collie, sae we rugged that ane.”[6] “And that was Lulie?” “Aye Sir. A jalouse it was nigh on an oor sin she’d started rinnin frae the dugs.”[7] “Go on.” “Weel, she louped ower the heid-dyke an rin up the steep nick o the Rig, oor dugs were gainin on her a the time, bit she gied us a braw guid rin over very reuch grund, fur at least anither twenty minutes.” [8]

“And now we come to the crucial bit. When did she hunker?” “When she’d got ower the crest o the Rig, she haed the Forestry Plantation aheed o her, wi the high deer-fence, she cudna rin ony further. The dugs were less nor a hundert yairds ahint her. She turned an foond a kenspeckle airt, an hunkered there – an that wis the richt thing fer her tae dae.”[9] “She cud hae turned the ither way an gane on rinnin –“ intrudes Wullie, “Silence!” snaps the Baillie, “I know the place, I can judge. But first, Sandy, what about the third complaint, that she gave up resisting you before she was properly takken?”

“Oor fower dugs, McRaes’ pair and oors, were on her and haudin her when we men cam up an ca’d em aff. She gave me a guid bit o trible, a dinna min tellin ye Sir. In the en, a got haud o her cuit an locked that tae her opposite wrust.[10] That wis when she stopped fechtin, anely then – she jaloused she’d bin fairly takken, an sae did a. A say agin, Sir, this linkie’s nae snuiler, she’s a braw bonnie fechter!”[11] Sandy’s account of my takkin draws a huge roar of applause from the crowd, even the cheerleader lassies from Glasgow are jumping up and down with excitement. I’d love to wave my arms too, but just look up and give him a big smile, “Thankyou, Sandy!”

The Baillie looks thoughtful, says, “Thankyou, Mr. McConchie. I think we’ve got the picture. I need a few moments discussion with the Maister.” He beckons the Major, they go inside the Tolbooth, we’re left standing watched by an excited crowd, it seems nobody’s drifted away, in fact numbers have swelled as word’s got around, respectable folk from Kirkside who wouldn’t normally be seen dead at such pagan gatherings haven’t been able to resist the spectacle!

[1] Skooked = hidden. Our dogs were misled and followed a trail to the den, but that was the girls’ own scent, not the food.
[2] Snoked the drag = picked up the scent.
[3] Dug-rin = when the hounds started following their trail, but the girls hadn’t yet been spotted.
[4] Checked = held up.
[5] Vizzie-hoo = the signal that they’d been spotted (by the ‘pointer’ on his tractor).
[6] The linkies had split up. The McC’s were already hunting one of them (Sheila), we chased the other (Lulie).
[7] I reckon it was nearly an hour since sh’d started running from the hounds.
[8] She leaped over the wall of the hill-pasture, and ran up the steep gully in the Ridge… she gave us a fine run over very rough ground for at least another 20 minutes.
[9] She turned and found a conspicuous place and signalled her surrender there, that was right.
[10] She gave me a good bit of trouble. In the end, I got hold of her ankle and locked that to her opposite wrist.
[11] She judged she’d been fairly caught, and so did I… this linkie’s no coward, she’s a fine fighter!
 
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