Limericks

[montycrusto]

Clever or fool … that is the question
In Monty’s case … one gets the impression
His verses were slick
But also a bit sick
So thirty-two demerits … was a fitting correction

My wit and whip-lit are so fine,
They are sweeter than chilled Riesling wine.
But my genius appears
To fall on deaf ears:
I’m casting my pearls before swine!

 

[Doragon]

I am amazed and awed by all your rhyming skills. Bravo.

 

[ducon007]

They are sweeter than chilled Riesling wine.

Hmmm, I prefer the Condrieu...

 

[montycrusto]

Hmmm, I prefer the Condrieu...

They all taste the same after the third bottle

 

[montycrusto]

I am amazed and awed by all your rhyming skills. Bravo.

You’re no slouch in the whip-lit department yourself @Doragon

 

[ducon007]

They all taste the same after the third bottle

And the headaches are exactly the same...

 

[montycrusto]

And the headaches are exactly the same...

I thought that was just mal du siècle

 

[twonines]

Hmmm, I prefer the Condrieu...

But does it work on Barb?

 

[montycrusto]

But does it work on Barb?

Perhaps if we blindfolded her and tied her naked to a chair, we could find out if she can tell the difference between one type of wine and another. Of course she knows the first rule of wine tasting: don’t swallow!

 

[twonines]

Perhaps if we blindfolded her and tied her naked to a chair, we could find out if she can tell the difference between one type of wine and another. Of course she knows the first rule of wine tasting: don’t swallow!

From my extensive research of Barb`s adventures, as chronicled in CF, it usually takes a minimum of eight strokes of the cane to get her to swallow.

 

[montycrusto]

Perhaps if we blindfolded her and tied her naked to a chair, we could find out if she can tell the difference between one type of wine and another. Of course she knows the first rule of wine tasting: don’t swallow!

There will of course be a range of punishments if she guesses wrong..

 

[Barbaria1]

There will of course be a range of punishments if she guesses wrong..

GULP

 

[montycrusto]

GULP

Ha! At last, wine-tasting is interesting . Let me just plug these cables in to the mains..

 

[Barbaria1]

Ha! At last, wine-tasting is interesting . Let me just plug these cables in to the mains..

Oh shit! How does one scream in terror and make it rhyme?

 

[montycrusto]

Naked, and strapped to a chair,
Barb knows she must wine-taste with care.
If her guess turns out wrong
Then a voltage most strong
Will rip through her nipples - beware!

 

[montycrusto]

Naked, and strapped to a chair,
Barb knows she must wine-taste with care.
If her guess turns out wrong
Then a voltage most strong
Will rip through her nipples - beware!

More terrible even than that,
Is the dildo of steel, long and fat,
It’s wired to the mains
In case she complains,
Or indulges in pointless chat.

 

[Barbaria1]

I’m feeling rather apprehensive
Because my nips are so sensitive
I dread every jolt
Every delivered volt
I intend to stream most declarative

 

[Barbaria1]

More terrible even than that,
Is the dildo of steel, long and fat,
It’s wired to the mains
In case she complains,
Or indulges in pointless chat.

Now you’ve done it!!!!!!!

 

[montycrusto]

Now you’ve done it!!!!!!!

Had to screenshot that for posterity:

How many is that, even? You know perfectly well I can’t count past 35. I’m going to say it’s infinity, that’s a big number

I think you’re going to have to take your demerit-gun in for servicing, after this!

 

[twonines]

Ha! At last, wine-tasting is interesting . Let me just plug these cables in to the mains..

Light and fruity taste, but somewhat metallic?