For me, the public display of the victim is particularly important. It's just part of a crucifixion. I find the thought of hanging naked on the cross in front of a crowd of onlookers very arousing. I am completely helpless in the eyes of the pack. I can't hide anything. I'm hanging on the cross, at first I squirm in pain, later I'll probably hang moveless on the crossbeam, totally exhausted.
I suffer endlessly, I sweat, I scream, I cry and the people in front of the cross get every detail. They can see everything. I am defenseless against the looks of the people. They can look at me, they can get aroused by my nudity.
All these looks! Curious looks, pitying looks. I can read sadistic joy in some eyes. "You get what you deserve!" those looks say. They mostly come from women.
But there are also a girl or two my age in whose eyes I can see a burning desire. These girls who stand still in front of the cross wish to be in my place, just as I wished to be in the victims' place when I looked up at the nailed girls before my first crucifixion.
For me, this public display is simply part of a crucifixion. It's the icing on the cake.
However, I also have a fantasy in which I am chosen as a sacrifice for some nature deity and I am led to a lonely clearing in the forest or a deserted place in the mountains and I am crucified there.
But most of the time I'm nailed to the cross in public and there's a lot of onlookers.
I particularly like the two images from mp5stab entitled "The Square". Especially the pic "Laura-closeup". (Unfortunately I don't know how to post the pics here).
When I saw these pics for the first time I was electrified.
That was exactly my favorite fantasy!
To be crucified in the middle of a sprawling old-fashioned marketplace! In a fantasyland, either medieval or maybe in a Victorian world where steam engines already exist.
I really liked the idea of hanging suffering on the cross and watching the market going on below me and hearing a steam train leaving in the distance.
I also kind of fell in love with the two cool pictures because the girl on the right looks like me.
I love to imagine being dragged out of my jail cell, stripped of all my clothes and having my hands tied behind my back. I have been chosen in a selection process to be crucified in the market square every Saturday for a year. Then I am led naked across the market to my ready lying cross, right through the crowd staring curiously. I feel every single smooth cobblestone under my bare soles and I can feel people's eyes on my bare skin. I'm incredibly ashamed because I'm naked and everyone is looking at me, but at the same time it arouses me.
I'm afraid of crucifixion but I'm also excited. I know I don't have to die on the cross. The crucified girls are taken down from the crosses at the end of the day and healed in a temple in a holy pool. But they have to line up again the next market day to be crucified for a whole day.
Then we come to the crosses. They are on the ground. Strong men put me on the wood and are holding me. One nails me, driving the nails through my wrists and then sideways through my ankles (I also often imagine there's a pedestal and my feet get nailed like crucifixes in church. I like that even better) . Then my cross will be raised and I will ascend. It's an absolutely great feeling, but accompanied by ever-increasing pain.
When the cross is vertical, the pain hits me with full force and I start screaming. Then I squirm screaming on the cross and below me the people stand and watch. Although my eyes are half-blind with tears, I see everything clearly. I can feel the curious, compassionate, horny and eager looks of the pack on my bare skin. I am infinitely ashamed to be hanging naked on the cross in front of all these people, but just that shame I enjoy.
Also the excruciating pain. It's an incredible feeling sensation for me. I feel anguish, pain, regret, remorse and shame, but also a hidden joy and a little pride that I am enduring it all.
After hours on the cross I am so exhausted that I often hang on the cross very still and motionless for long periods of time. Then I can feel the looks of the market visitors even more clearly.
My question to you is now:
Is public display part of it for you? Or do you not care? What do you personally prefer
