Hondoboot2
QUAESTOR PULCHRITUDINIS
Good, I like gifts, especially ones tied like that
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The Olympic Crux
- Thread starter thehangingtree
- Start date
Another night and deeper in shit. The smell was so bad that Gunner finally came around and dumped gravel over the surface (but not before pawing me over a little and wanting a bj ... I refused, telling him I don't do that). Speaking of pawing, before Gunner showed up there were these dogs. I dunno where they came from. They looked wolf-like. I know what you all are thinking ... not the guy variety of wolf (Wragg and Hondo are nowhere to be seen) ... I mean the lupus variety! But they wanted to lick me, and I couldn't shoo them away. They licked my sweaty bare back and neck and my boobs, especially my boobs and my tumescent nips. Drove me absolute nuts!!!! I wonder if Joan had anything to do with this? Nah, she was hanged, that's right. Well look on the bright side, at least they never took a bite and their pee will wash off once I get outta here, and my time in the shit must be nearly over by now.
Nice write but you still have a full day and night and till noon after that... Are you bored yet???
Hondoboot2
QUAESTOR PULCHRITUDINIS
Was there a full moon?
Good helping there, Hondo, with the morale and keeping her spirits up and all.Was there a full moon?
Was there a full moon?
Good helping there, Hondo, with the morale and keeping her spirits up and all.
When I get out of this mess ... you three are going to have some explaining to do 
Hey, don't look at me. I'm just the guy that resigned your team to train another person, leaving you to hire Tree to bury you in a pit. This has absolutely nothing to do with me now.View attachment 390437 When I get out of this mess ... you three are going to have some explaining to do
Ask Thessela. I'm not burying her in a pit, am I?
"No, Jolly, not in a pit. Are we going to be there soon?"
Yes, I think so. Quite soon.
(How far is Missouri, anyway?)
She will be less happy with next epi...View attachment 390437 When I get out of this mess ... you three are going to have some explaining to do
THT Dude Ranch is in Arizona... Time and distance means little at CF...Hey, don't look at me. I'm just the guy that resigned your team to train another person, leaving you to hire Tree to bury you in a pit. This has absolutely nothing to do with me now.
Ask Thessela. I'm not burying her in a pit, am I?
View attachment 390439
"No, Jolly, not in a pit. Are we going to be there soon?"
Yes, I think so. Quite soon.
(How far is Missouri, anyway?)
T
Time is an illusion, yes, and a thousand years are as a day to God, they say, but we'll never get to this ranch if we don't go to Arizona.
In that case, I check with the conductor about our destination. He assures me there is a small siding at THT where we can be dropped off.
The good news is that two of the Japanese Embassy staff, the nice lady who found us in her tea room, and her 'friend', a large fellow with a hat (I think he's her bodyguard) have joined the now ethnically diverse Canadian team. We have a full crux squad at last.
Travel is always a bit surreal, don't you find?
"It looks a bit bleak."
I'm sure the ranch is just around the corner. It is hot, isn't it? Even our new Japanese-canadians look uncomfortable.
This should be great for training, if we don't all die of heat stroke and dehydration first.
"What!?"
Just an expression. Come on. Let's find the dude ranch.
Thessela
Beloved slavegirl
Hey, don't look at me. I'm just the guy that resigned your team to train another person, leaving you to hire Tree to bury you in a pit. This has absolutely nothing to do with me now.
Ask Thessela. I'm not burying her in a pit, am I?
View attachment 390439
"No, Jolly, not in a pit. Are we going to be there soon?"
Yes, I think so. Quite soon.
(How far is Missouri, anyway?)
I like train travel
Especially when Jollyrei pays the fare....I like train travel
Thessela
Beloved slavegirl
Last night on the plateau…
I have to do this again tomorrow and half of the next day? I begin to think it’s been Tree standing in the sun instead of me! What the fuck is this supposed to prove? I have already learned I am tired, bored, uncomfortable, helpless, and may I add pissed off to that list. Twilight is rapidly fading and the two monster dogs dig in the gravel to bare me down below my ribs before the fuckers lap at my breasts for what seems forever before lying down about 10 feet away on either side of me as the light fades.
Its dark now and a million stars I can’t see in the city fill the sky around me. I must admit it is a beautiful sight But I am tired and doze off…
What the hell is going on? I hear the mongrels growling and in the distance I hear coyotes baying. The two dogs bolt off behind me running towards the coyotes’ howls. There are clouds covering half the stars and they thicken with each minute. Surely it’s not going to rain. It is getting dark.
Just as I think there is no way it could rain here in desert a bolt of lightning hits close enough on the plateau I am half-buried on! It is so close I feel its energy in the ground and over my flesh and the thunder follows only a split second later so loud I would have jumped out of the pit if I could. This is fucking great. I am going to be a lightning rod on this damn plateau!
Somewhere in the distance the dogs sound like they have gotten in a fight with the coyotes. Some of the animals are not faring well. Large rain drops start pelting me. Fuck, what’s next? –Barbara Moore
In this part of Arizona the average daily highs are near 110°F and the lows are rarely below 80°F and rain is indeed rare. But in certain years it does get monsoon-like deluges as Barb is about to learn. The rain-cooled air also drops to the low 70s chilling her sun baked skin. Oh… is that hail hitting her?
Christ what next? I am freezing my tits off and the hail is beating the hell out of me! Oh, fucking great! One of the two mongrels drags the wet carcass of a coyote it killed and leans it against my back then wraps itself around me and falls asleep with my breasts laying on its stinking wet fur! My efforts to shoo it off are futile and the damn thing snores worse than Tree (not that I would know)! I must admit after a bit I am at least warm…
It rains, sometimes in torrents through much of the early morning. I guess Tree figured I could just tilt my head back and stick my tongue out if I need water. Add while I am not that thirsty I am famished have no food since the morning I started my walk the hill. Besides the aches boredom and loneliness are my biggest torment. The rain has loosened the crap down to my hips. It was loose enough I could have easily pulled my hands out of the muck if the wrist irons weren’t attached to shackles. The after the rain stops the two dogs entertain themselves a dozen yards away tearing apart the carcass of the coyote they killed last night. I hear Tree’s Jeep approaching.
“Good morning, Sunshine” I say as I climb out. By the glare she gives me she is not in a good mood! I say “Come on, Barb, just two and a half more hours and you’re done!”
“Come on Tree, give me a break and let me stop now” she says. “It was a terrible night!”
I give it a thought and said “I’ll make a deal. If I let you up now you have to walk back.”
“With the shackles and ball and chain- no thanks!”
“You still have to wear the shackles but I’ll let you off with the ball and chain. What will it be Barb? In an hour from now you could be taking a soothing shower then a soaking bath or you can be facing another hour and a half in there” I say while she shoots me her patented pouty look.
“Get me the hell out of this shit now” I demand. He reaches into muck behind me and swiftly unlocks the wrist irons. I feel them sink past my tight little into muck. Tree wraps a thick strap around my chest just below my arms. He hooks the other end to an electric winch, press a switch and I feel my body feeling pulled forward over the edge of the pit. As I’m extracted I feel my feet pull free of the gravel while the chains are dragged after them as they are all still attached to the shackles. Tree stops the winch as soon as I am free of the pit. I sit on the dirt while he drags a coiled hose from Jeep and rinsed the couplers off and removes all the chains except the shackles. I ask if he would rinse me off and he says he would in a moment.
After he tosses the chains and irons in the back of his Jeep he tells me to stand. I do and he takes the hose and rinses first my front then sides and back. With my back to him I shamelessly order him hose me off ‘down there’. He obliges me and I was front and rear until the water tank runs dry. He has me waddle closer to the Jeep and locks a collar iron collar around my neck that is chained to the rollbar of Jeep. I’m given a large bottle of water which I guzzle down. Then Tree locks my wrists in irons that hold them crossed behind back but to my surprise he removes the shackles. He tosses them in the back of the Jeep then turns to me and says “You did good, Barb” before he turns to climb into the driver’s seat. While he’s not looking at me I puff out my chest and smile proudly.
Her triumph is somewhat diminished as the two mile barefoot hike down the gravel path back to Hangtown takes its toll on Barb. Normally, Barb could have done it easily even barefoot but the lack of food and minimal water and sleep during the past 72 hours.
(I think this is a Skating Jesus someone removed the signature from)
But Tree was right that in less than hour Barb would be in a soothing shower, with an added bonus the lovely Ulrika was there to ‘help’…
Tree
I have to do this again tomorrow and half of the next day? I begin to think it’s been Tree standing in the sun instead of me! What the fuck is this supposed to prove? I have already learned I am tired, bored, uncomfortable, helpless, and may I add pissed off to that list. Twilight is rapidly fading and the two monster dogs dig in the gravel to bare me down below my ribs before the fuckers lap at my breasts for what seems forever before lying down about 10 feet away on either side of me as the light fades.
Its dark now and a million stars I can’t see in the city fill the sky around me. I must admit it is a beautiful sight But I am tired and doze off…
What the hell is going on? I hear the mongrels growling and in the distance I hear coyotes baying. The two dogs bolt off behind me running towards the coyotes’ howls. There are clouds covering half the stars and they thicken with each minute. Surely it’s not going to rain. It is getting dark.
Just as I think there is no way it could rain here in desert a bolt of lightning hits close enough on the plateau I am half-buried on! It is so close I feel its energy in the ground and over my flesh and the thunder follows only a split second later so loud I would have jumped out of the pit if I could. This is fucking great. I am going to be a lightning rod on this damn plateau!
Somewhere in the distance the dogs sound like they have gotten in a fight with the coyotes. Some of the animals are not faring well. Large rain drops start pelting me. Fuck, what’s next? –Barbara Moore
In this part of Arizona the average daily highs are near 110°F and the lows are rarely below 80°F and rain is indeed rare. But in certain years it does get monsoon-like deluges as Barb is about to learn. The rain-cooled air also drops to the low 70s chilling her sun baked skin. Oh… is that hail hitting her?
Christ what next? I am freezing my tits off and the hail is beating the hell out of me! Oh, fucking great! One of the two mongrels drags the wet carcass of a coyote it killed and leans it against my back then wraps itself around me and falls asleep with my breasts laying on its stinking wet fur! My efforts to shoo it off are futile and the damn thing snores worse than Tree (not that I would know)! I must admit after a bit I am at least warm…
It rains, sometimes in torrents through much of the early morning. I guess Tree figured I could just tilt my head back and stick my tongue out if I need water. Add while I am not that thirsty I am famished have no food since the morning I started my walk the hill. Besides the aches boredom and loneliness are my biggest torment. The rain has loosened the crap down to my hips. It was loose enough I could have easily pulled my hands out of the muck if the wrist irons weren’t attached to shackles. The after the rain stops the two dogs entertain themselves a dozen yards away tearing apart the carcass of the coyote they killed last night. I hear Tree’s Jeep approaching.
“Good morning, Sunshine” I say as I climb out. By the glare she gives me she is not in a good mood! I say “Come on, Barb, just two and a half more hours and you’re done!”
“Come on Tree, give me a break and let me stop now” she says. “It was a terrible night!”
I give it a thought and said “I’ll make a deal. If I let you up now you have to walk back.”
“With the shackles and ball and chain- no thanks!”
“You still have to wear the shackles but I’ll let you off with the ball and chain. What will it be Barb? In an hour from now you could be taking a soothing shower then a soaking bath or you can be facing another hour and a half in there” I say while she shoots me her patented pouty look.
“Get me the hell out of this shit now” I demand. He reaches into muck behind me and swiftly unlocks the wrist irons. I feel them sink past my tight little into muck. Tree wraps a thick strap around my chest just below my arms. He hooks the other end to an electric winch, press a switch and I feel my body feeling pulled forward over the edge of the pit. As I’m extracted I feel my feet pull free of the gravel while the chains are dragged after them as they are all still attached to the shackles. Tree stops the winch as soon as I am free of the pit. I sit on the dirt while he drags a coiled hose from Jeep and rinsed the couplers off and removes all the chains except the shackles. I ask if he would rinse me off and he says he would in a moment.
After he tosses the chains and irons in the back of his Jeep he tells me to stand. I do and he takes the hose and rinses first my front then sides and back. With my back to him I shamelessly order him hose me off ‘down there’. He obliges me and I was front and rear until the water tank runs dry. He has me waddle closer to the Jeep and locks a collar iron collar around my neck that is chained to the rollbar of Jeep. I’m given a large bottle of water which I guzzle down. Then Tree locks my wrists in irons that hold them crossed behind back but to my surprise he removes the shackles. He tosses them in the back of the Jeep then turns to me and says “You did good, Barb” before he turns to climb into the driver’s seat. While he’s not looking at me I puff out my chest and smile proudly.
Her triumph is somewhat diminished as the two mile barefoot hike down the gravel path back to Hangtown takes its toll on Barb. Normally, Barb could have done it easily even barefoot but the lack of food and minimal water and sleep during the past 72 hours.
(I think this is a Skating Jesus someone removed the signature from)
But Tree was right that in less than hour Barb would be in a soothing shower, with an added bonus the lovely Ulrika was there to ‘help’…
Tree
This is great, Tree, you should get an award for this.
Winning that gold medal will be a cake walk after your tireless efforts at training her. Most people would be content simply to send her to the gym for an hour or two each day, but I have to say that you've really gone the second mile.
I'm only very sorry that she isn't as grateful as she should be.
Thank you... I think before she leaves for LA she will find an enjoyable change in the training...This is great, Tree, you should get an award for this.
Winning that gold medal will be a cake walk after your tireless efforts at training her. Most people would be content simply to send her to the gym for an hour or two each day, but I have to say that you've really gone the second mile.
I'm only very sorry that she isn't as grateful as she should be.
T
So glad to be off that plateau ... putting on my academic hat and sitting down to grade Tree's writing on this episode:Originality: A+ (can't say this one is same old)
Imaginative: A (for him, yes)
Typing: A (he must have actually proof read this one)
Illustrations: A (love the darkening light ... nice touch)
Realism: A (see above)
Dialogue: A (he does Barb better than Barb does)
Civility: B- (I am being generous here)
Kindness to animals: D+ (thinking of the poor coyote here, not me)
Scatological factor: B+ (hardly a mention of shit in this one)
automotive factor: C- (I wanted to ride in his Mustang, not run behind a jeep)
sexuality: B (sorry Ulrika, I prefer blondes)
Overall grade: A (I am feeling generous today)
There you go, Tree, old bean!
Maybe she is a little bit grateful!
Careful with the praise .... we don't want it to go to his head
Be assured it was a rabid coyote, not member El Coyote, that it and its pack had designs on changing our Blue State Girl in rare red meat...
As for Tree doing 'Barb better than Barb does' that is a high compliment but if a vote was taken by CF members...
...I think Barb would win hands down...
Forget the Mustang, Kid...
sorry Ulrika, I prefer blondes... Ulrika understands completely... She was just helping you cope until Siss gets here to help you with your last week of training before you head to the required week of sequestration in the rented obsolete prison in LA. Did I mention it will be manned by guards from the IMF and Scandals Resort?
Tree
...No I don't know what means... yet...