The last rape.
The last of too many to be counted.
... but ...
... the absolute worst of my ordeal up to this point has been...
... those few moments of hanging by my wrists only, right after you raised me up on my cross, my feet kicking and struggling and pressing against the post but slipping, finding no purchase...
... those lightning bolts of unimaginable agony that shot through my body...
... it was so bad that I begged you, quickly, quickly, nail my feet too, knowing but not caring that there would be new pains... but at least I would be able to push up!!!...
... you just laughed and tossed away the hammer and nails ...
... so cruel of you! They're
my nails! Give them to me!
Please pick them up again! Oh please finish me right now!
... but no ...
I could not have imagined that anything would get me to desire that!
But when you get crucified, you are no longer what you were before ... maybe just before I become nothing, I'll find out what I really am...
But oh! now you take your pleasure. A man's well-deserved reward after all the hard work. But yes, it
is good for me too. And I'm trying to make it just right for you. Because as you grasp me and thrust deep inside me, ... you're ... lifting me up ... and taking away that horrible pain. It's such a relief and it's only natural to pick up your rhythm. Oh yes fuck that pain away if just for a moment ... or two ... or....