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Crucifixion And You: How Did The Idea Start?

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XICVLC said:
I would say that mine has a religious origin too, as I feel very attracted to carholic penances, and crucifixion is the “last one”. I also like the idea of being crucified for a reason, I am guilty and I must be punished.
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Mine doesn't involve "penance" but rather imagining myself in the predicament or being one of the participants or onlookers in illustrations in Orthodox paintings of icons with the various "Saints", male and female being dispatched in barbarous ways :)
 
All started when my family was watching 'The passion of Christ (2006)' and I joined them because curiosity. The thing started in the moment when Jesus was stripped of for flagelation, they covered my eyes until the flagelation ended, and they repeat that action when Jesus was taken to the cross and nailed.
Since that I felt a huge curiosity for that scenes.

1 week later, I take the DVD and played that 2 scenes I couldn't see, since that, everytime I could be alone in home I played specifically that 2 scenes. All that happened when I was 7 years old.

One year later, I started to fantasize with that 2 scenes. Mainly I loved to fantasize with me being stripped off and exposed in public for get whipped, and the same before being crucified.
Also I was used to play to be crucified in my room with an improvised toilet paper loincloth and cross , and I lied in that in the tipically pose with both arms extended (I kept like that like about half an hour).
And was in one of those times playing like that that I had my first erection, in that time I was confused about that and didn't know what was happening to me (because I was 8 years old then).
Searching in the Internet I discovered that was a sexual thing and that I erotically like the 'theme of crucifixion'.

After all those years searching about crucifixion and stuff in the Internet I never get to find people who likes this theme.
Although searched on the Internet I never finded erotic information about crucifixion and thought I was the unic weirdo with this fetish

Until the last year I decided to open with this theme, I first told it to my boyfriend and he accepted it surprisingly good, I felt like I was releasing a big burden.
With him I assembled a cross and he tied me up and I 'half'-hang on it
That was one of the most exciting experiences of my life, something I wanted for too many years finally was getting real
I was hang on like 30 minutes and I would liked to be more time if it was not because I realized my hands was turning black.

With the passing of the months I kept searching about crucifixion until some days ago I finded this forum and I get surprised because now I know that i'm not the unic person with this fetish
It surprise me that this forum is more than 10 years being active, how I didn't find this before?
 
prossesor said:
All started when my family was watching 'The passion of Christ (2006)' and I joined them because curiosity. The thing started in the moment when Jesus was stripped of for flagelation, they covered my eyes until the flagelation ended, and they repeat that action when Jesus was taken to the cross and nailed.
Since that I felt a huge curiosity for that scenes.

1 week later, I take the DVD and played that 2 scenes I couldn't see, since that, everytime I could be alone in home I played specifically that 2 scenes. All that happened when I was 7 years old.

One year later, I started to fantasize with that 2 scenes. Mainly I loved to fantasize with me being stripped off and exposed in public for get whipped, and the same before being crucified.
Also I was used to play to be crucified in my room with an improvised toilet paper loincloth and cross , and I lied in that in the tipically pose with both arms extended (I kept like that like about half an hour).
And was in one of those times playing like that that I had my first erection, in that time I was confused about that and didn't know what was happening to me (because I was 8 years old then).
Searching in the Internet I discovered that was a sexual thing and that I erotically like the 'theme of crucifixion'.

After all those years searching about crucifixion and stuff in the Internet I never get to find people who likes this theme.
Although searched on the Internet I never finded erotic information about crucifixion and thought I was the unic weirdo with this fetish

Until the last year I decided to open with this theme, I first told it to my boyfriend and he accepted it surprisingly good, I felt like I was releasing a big burden.
With him I assembled a cross and he tied me up and I 'half'-hang on it
That was one of the most exciting experiences of my life, something I wanted for too many years finally was getting real
I was hang on like 30 minutes and I would liked to be more time if it was not because I realized my hands was turning black.

With the passing of the months I kept searching about crucifixion until some days ago I finded this forum and I get surprised because now I know that i'm not the unic person with this fetish
It surprise me that this forum is more than 10 years being active, how I didn't find this before?
Click to expand...

Welcome to our community. No, you are not the only person fascinated by the crucifixion and I think that on this forum we represent only a tiny fraction of people who fantasize about this subject, but at least we dare to admit it and share this fantasy with others while remaining anonymous.
 
I have always been to attracted to the combination of sex and death. When I was younger I would have fantasies about being crucified and dying slowly but they was no specific path for me until I saw some footage from Red Feline on the Cross. And then I looked at Quoom's work, especially Fall of the Barbarian queen which shows her journey from defiant prisoner to a dead body. I got turned on by the thought of seeing a naked woman suffering and dying on the cross.
 
With six or seven years, in a Catholic religious school. There was a small book with illustrations of the passion of Christ. I watched the scenes of the scourging and crucifixion over and over again, fascinated, without knowing why. The ones on Palm Sunday, the Last Supper, and the Resurrection didn't interest me.

I think it started there.
 
prossesor said:
All started when my family was watching 'The passion of Christ (2006)' and I joined them because curiosity. The thing started in the moment when Jesus was stripped of for flagelation, they covered my eyes until the flagelation ended, and they repeat that action when Jesus was taken to the cross and nailed.
Since that I felt a huge curiosity for that scenes.

1 week later, I take the DVD and played that 2 scenes I couldn't see, since that, everytime I could be alone in home I played specifically that 2 scenes. All that happened when I was 7 years old.

One year later, I started to fantasize with that 2 scenes. Mainly I loved to fantasize with me being stripped off and exposed in public for get whipped, and the same before being crucified.
Also I was used to play to be crucified in my room with an improvised toilet paper loincloth and cross , and I lied in that in the tipically pose with both arms extended (I kept like that like about half an hour).
And was in one of those times playing like that that I had my first erection, in that time I was confused about that and didn't know what was happening to me (because I was 8 years old then).
Searching in the Internet I discovered that was a sexual thing and that I erotically like the 'theme of crucifixion'.

After all those years searching about crucifixion and stuff in the Internet I never get to find people who likes this theme.
Although searched on the Internet I never finded erotic information about crucifixion and thought I was the unic weirdo with this fetish

Until the last year I decided to open with this theme, I first told it to my boyfriend and he accepted it surprisingly good, I felt like I was releasing a big burden.
With him I assembled a cross and he tied me up and I 'half'-hang on it
That was one of the most exciting experiences of my life, something I wanted for too many years finally was getting real
I was hang on like 30 minutes and I would liked to be more time if it was not because I realized my hands was turning black.

With the passing of the months I kept searching about crucifixion until some days ago I finded this forum and I get surprised because now I know that i'm not the unic person with this fetish
It surprise me that this forum is more than 10 years being active, how I didn't find this before?
Click to expand...
Welcome to our group, we are an eclectic bunch with various violent kinks either receiving or inflicting (or both!)

I only discovered the group about 6 months ago, and crux isn’t my highest level kink- I’ve found a safe space where people don’t get outraged by strange kinks I share freely here. I love this forum!

Thank you for sharing your interesting story!
LCs
 
I grew up religious, but the imagery never really did anything to me at the time. I enjoyed bondage stuff, though, and I'm pretty sure there was some sort of rope crucifixion that made its way into a bondage subreddit and I've been hooked ever since. I guess I've been ok with some of the "darker" fantasies for a long time, so something that mixes the helplessness of being tied up with the struggle to breathe of the cross was bound to appeal to me, right? :)
 
For me, it started when I was given the movie book with pictures called Jesus of Nazareth, about the 1977 film with Robert Powell, and became fascinated with the pictures of the crucifixion scenes. I wanted to be put through a real Roman Crucifixion just like he was. I would have given almost anything for just five minutes replacing him on the cross. I imagined and often pretended I was being crucified in that way. Later, I yearned to be up there on the cross as before, but with at least one of the people crucified with me on either side being a woman. And she must be treated the same way as the men including being bare breasted. Once up on our crosses we would talk sharing looks of sympathy and understanding, mixed with attraction. But, yes, the movie book of the 1977 Jesus of Nazareth film. That's how it started for me.
 
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Raised in a roman-catholic manner I was common with illustrations of crucifixion and martyrs. The natural curiosity of childern led into the imagination of what it was like to be crucified. So I started to test this out as good as possible on playgrounds or in the forest. I tortured myself in different ways and hung me from wooden or metal climbing structures as well as branches for as long as I could. Or laying me in front of my bed and grabbing its feet. Later the focus went more to BDSM but crucifixion always stayed in mind. Since it is not the most common topic in society, it was kept as a hidden secret. Untill the days when a nice lovely lady entered my life and became my girlfriend. . She was the first one with a BDSM-background and very openminded. So she became the first real person to get to know these of my crucifixion-fantasies. "Ok, we'll work on that to find out solutions to make your wish come true...", she answered surprisingly. So we started with rudimentical settings in her place by using some of her furniture.
Later she moved out of her place and we switched the bureau room in my place into a BDSM playroom. Not to mention that a crux-possibility had to be integrated. ;)
We much increased the technical solutions within praticing crucifixion within the last seven years.
 
Crucified Life said:
For me, it started when I was given the movie book with pictures called Jesus of Nazareth, about the 1977 film with Robert Powell, and became fascinated with the pictures of the crucifixion scenes. I wanted to be put through a real Roman Crucifixion just like he was. I would have given almost anything for just five minutes replacing him on the cross. I imagined and often pretended I was being crucified in that way. Later, I yearned to be up there on the cross as before, but with at least one of the people crucified with me on either side being a woman. And she must be treated the same way as the men including being bare breasted. Once up on our crosses we would talk sharing looks of sympathy and understanding, mixed with attraction. But, yes, the movie book of the 1977 Jesus of Nazareth film. That's how it started for me.
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I would like to add something here. When I was undergoing this phase, only a youth and learning I was into crucifixion with the help of this 1977 Jesus of Nazareth film book with the overwhelming and intoxicating pictures of crucifixion, I remember having vivid dreams and fantasies about crucifixion and my own crucifixion. I had a fantasy which once played out in a dream so profound, although a little foggy, where I would be pulled away from my life temporarily, kind of teleported to some place where people go when they are not dead, but maybe are in a dimension between life and death where you can choose to go back and continue your life or enter where you enter the afterlife, even if prematurely. There I would be asked if I want to return to my life or not and that I would be granted a request as a reward for being a good person for what I go to, whatever that would be. As my request, I would ask to be crucified with the crucifixion that I desire, the way that I want it to be. They tell me that I do not deserve such suffering and tell me of the consequences of my choice, that I would be giving up the chance to live a good life. I tell them that if I had been such a good person I deserve to be able to experience crucifixion for real if that is what I want and that I understand and accept the consequences. They reluctantly agree and tell me that I will be returned to life but in another time, replacing someone who had been condemned to crucifixion who did not deserve it. This person would skip crucifixion and come straight to them. They tell me that I will endure brutal crucifixion like a hardened male criminal and will endure everything they would despite only being a youth. Everyone around will see a developed man's body, but only I will know and see myself for what I really am. The dream unfortunately skipped my nailing and raising and whipping and other details, taking up with me on the cross looking around at my body and feeling what I want to feel and finally feeling happy. Then I woke up, back in my life, feeling a little cheated that it was all just a dream.
 
Crucified Life said:
I would like to add something here. When I was undergoing this phase, only a youth and learning I was into crucifixion with the help of this 1977 Jesus of Nazareth film book with the overwhelming and intoxicating pictures of crucifixion, I remember having vivid dreams and fantasies about crucifixion and my own crucifixion. I had a fantasy which once played out in a dream so profound, although a little foggy, where I would be pulled away from my life temporarily, kind of teleported to some place where people go when they are not dead, but maybe are in a dimension between life and death where you can choose to go back and continue your life or enter where you enter the afterlife, even if prematurely. There I would be asked if I want to return to my life or not and that I would be granted a request as a reward for being a good person for what I go to, whatever that would be. As my request, I would ask to be crucified with the crucifixion that I desire, the way that I want it to be. They tell me that I do not deserve such suffering and tell me of the consequences of my choice, that I would be giving up the chance to live a good life. I tell them that if I had been such a good person I deserve to be able to experience crucifixion for real if that is what I want and that I understand and accept the consequences. They reluctantly agree and tell me that I will be returned to life but in another time, replacing someone who had been condemned to crucifixion who did not deserve it. This person would skip crucifixion and come straight to them. They tell me that I will endure brutal crucifixion like a hardened male criminal and will endure everything they would despite only being a youth. Everyone around will see a developed man's body, but only I will know and see myself for what I really am. The dream unfortunately skipped my nailing and raising and whipping and other details, taking up with me on the cross looking around at my body and feeling what I want to feel and finally feeling happy. Then I woke up, back in my life, feeling a little cheated that it was all just a dream.
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Next time I want to come with you dreaming.
 
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